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Police Discover Meth Lab In Back Room of Alabama Walmart

March 30, 2017

DECATUR, Alabama -  Police were recently tipped off to a reported meth lab that was being run by Walmart employees in what they are calling one of the biggest busts in decades. Police Chief Robert Garner said ...

Headlines
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Hackers Plan To Release Donald Trump Sex Tape – But It’s Not Melania In The Video With Him!

March 30, 2017

WASHINGTON, D.C. -  After a slew of celebrity devices were hacked, a group of anonymous individuals have begun leaking nude images and sex tapes recorded by the celebrity victims. The latest seems to be President Donald ...

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Sean Spicer Contracts Bird Flu From Bad Kentucky Fried Chicken

March 29, 2017

WASHINGTON, D.C. - White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer was hospitalized after he contracted what he said was "bird flu" from eating a bucket of KFC chicken that had spoiled. According to his doctor, Spicer merely had ...

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Morgue Employee Cremated By Mistake While Taking a Nap During His Break

March 28, 2017

BEAUMONT, Texas - 48-year old Henri Paul Johnson was killed last week after he was accidentally cremated during a long shift at the Coroner's Office Morgue. According to police, Johnson took a nap on a stretcher after ...

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President Trump Plans 2-Month Vacation To Bahamas After ‘Stressful’ First Quarter

March 27, 2017

WASHINGTON, D.C. -  President Trump announced this morning that he would be taking a 2-month vacation beginning April 1st, returning to Washington in June, after a "stressful" first quarter of 2017. "There are a lot of things ...

Lifestyle
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Prayer Group Now Taking Requests For People Who Deserve To Die

March 26, 2017

BOISE, Idaho - A prayer group in Boise, Idaho has put out a request on social media saying that they will accept "prayer requests" for people who should be wished dead, or otherwise injured - converse ...

Health/Fitness
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Los Angeles Doctor Offers World’s Most Expensive Colon Cleanse Using Aborted Fetuses, ‘Blood of the Innocent’

March 26, 2017

LOS ANGELES, California -  Doctor Carl Jung, a gastroenterologist working in Los Angeles, California, has said he has developed the world's most perfect, and most expensive, colon cleanse for his patients who need to "get the ...

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Pope Francis Caught On Security Camera Stealing Food Placed Out For Homeless

March 19, 2017

VATICAN CITY -  Pope Francis was caught stealing food that had been placed behind the Vatican for homeless last night, causing many to decry him as "evil." According to Vatican Police, the footage was retrieved from a ...

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