Cleveland Browns Rookie QB Johnny Manziel ‘Guarantees’ He Will Take Browns To Super Bowl
September 05, 2014
CLEVELAND, Ohio - The outspoken, flamboyant, controversial Cleveland Browns rookie and second-string quarterback, Johnny Manziel, has guaranteed that he will take the Browns to the Super Bowl this season, something that has never been accomplished in ...
Insurance Policy Canceled for Progressive Insurance Actress ‘Flo’
September 05, 2014
HOLLYWOOD, California – “It was a simple oversight,” explains actress and comedian Stephanie Courtney, known to millions as the quirky Progressive Insurance spokesperson ‘Flo.’” The actress’ insurance policy, covered under SAG-AFTRA, the radio and television artist’s union, ...
‘Key To The City’ Opens Bank Safe; Town Funds Go Missing
September 04, 2014
BRENTSVILLE, Tennessee – “He seemed like a great guy,” said Mayor Sam Cannon, formerly of Brentsville, Tennessee. “Mayor Sam,” as everyone in town calls him, didn’t move away from Brentsville; Brentsville moved away from him. It all ...
7-Year-Old Hooked On Phonics, Refuses To Kick The Habit
September 04, 2014
CALDWELL, New Jersey – Learning to read is one of the greatest milestones in a child’s early development. For the family of 7-year-old Peter Hall, what started off as a blessing quickly turned into a curse. Peter was ...
Doctors & FCC Conclude WiFi Networks Cause Migraine Headaches
September 04, 2014
BALTIMORE, Maryland – The ‘tin foil hat crowd’ may not be so crazy after all. Doctors at Baltimore’s Johns Hopkins School of Medicine have announced today a link between the most common high-speed Wi-Fi bandwidth frequencies ...
Disgustingly Named Frozen Treat Is A Big Hit With Kids
September 03, 2014
KANSAS CITY, Missouri – Gummy Worms; Creepy Crawlies; The Cootie Game -- the more repulsive a brand name sounds, the more popular it becomes with kids. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you haven’t heard of ...
Helen Keller Driving School Opens In Tuscumbia, Alabama
September 03, 2014
TUSCUMBIA, Alabama – John Cadbury has his famous chocolates, William Colgate’s toothpaste is a household name, and now, Helen Keller has a driving school named after her. The first blind and deaf woman to earn a bachelor’s ...
Actress Betty White, 99, Dyes Peacefully In Her Los Angeles Home
September 03, 2014
LOS ANGELES, California - In a press release from her long-time manager Jeff Witjas, it has been confirmed today that actress Betty White, best known for her roles on TVs The Mary Tyler Moore Show, The Golden Girls, and Hot ...