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Donald Trump Makes MASSIVE Donation of Play-Doh To Texas Flood Victims; ‘They Need Things To Do and To Have Fun’

August 31, 2017

DALLAS-FORT WORTH, Texas -  President Trump visited some of the cities that have been almost completely washed away by Hurricane Harvey, bringing not only a positive message, but a MASSIVE donation of Play-Doh. "These kids, and these ...

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‘Mr. America’ To Return To WWE After 15 Years in Retirement, Wants to ‘Drop the Leg’ on Donald Trump

August 31, 2017

STAMFORD, Connecticut -  After near 2 decade absence, patriotic muscleman Mr. America will be making a surprise return to WWE television, with an announcement that he would be headlining a match on Monday Night Raw, the company's ...


A Riot In Nursing Home Leaves Dozens With Broken Hips, Police Are Still Investigating

August 31, 2017

DETROIT, Michigan -  Complete chaos erupted at Shady Creek Assisted Living and Retirement Home community in Detroit, Michigan when a scheduled outing to Dunkin’ Donuts was canceled with no explanation. Elderly people living in that community ...


Maine Becomes the First State to Legalize Ecstasy

August 31, 2017

AUGUSTA, Maine -  Maine has been in the news all year for legalizing marijuana for recreational use, and apparently legalizing weed was only the beginning. Following on the heels of the wave of marijuana legalization, some might ...


Trump Plans To Demolish The Statue of Liberty, Says We No Longer Accept ‘Tired or Poor’

August 31, 2017

WASHINGTON, D.C. -  President Trump announced late last night that congress voted 322 to 105 in favor of dismantling the statue of liberty, due to its “misleading statements” engraved on the pedestal. The statue reads: “Give me your tired, your poor, ...


World Health Organization Admits Over 50,000 People Accidentally Injected with Ebola Virus Instead of Flu Vaccine

August 31, 2017

ATLANTA, Georgia -  Over 50,000 people throughout the United States are on high alert this week after flu vaccines were contaminated with the Ebola virus and accidentally sent out to clinics throughout the country. Recipients had lined up for ...


MASSIVE Milk Recall In Place After Iodine Found in Country’s Biggest Supplier

August 29, 2017

TOPEKA, Kansas -  A devastating report coming out of the Midwest United States this morning announces a recall of over 2.5 million gallons of milk that tested positive for iodine. The tainted milk has left at ...


White House Doctor Report Trump Has Lost Nearly 50% of Vision in Right Eye After Staring at Eclipse

August 29, 2017

WASHINGTON, D.C. -  In a move that nearly everyone called "totally retarded," President Trump stood out on the White House balcony during the solar eclipse, and stared directly into the sun. White House physician, Dr. Mark ...

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