Man Attempts To Kill Girlfriend After Dreaming She Cheated On Him

Posted on February 6, 2015 by ZGHarris

TALLAHASSEE, Florida –

A Florida man is behind bars today after he allegedly tried to take his girlfriend’s life. According to the victim, the altercation occurred when Wrangle had a dream that she was unfaithful to him.

Jacob Walter Wrangle was arrested on Wednesday following a vicious attack on his girlfriend, Jennie-Lynn Smyth. According to the victim, Wrangle reportedly awoke at 4 AM, and begin shouting and thrashing.

“He was screaming ‘Oh no you don’t. Not like this!’ and started grabbing at me,” said Smyth. “But he just kept screaming and saying ‘You can’t make me a fool. I’m your man!’”

Smyth said she then realized he was in the midst of a dream and attempted to calm him down. According to Smyth, Wrangle overpowered her and began to reach for a weapon. “I knew he had the handgun under the bed. But I was able to make my way to a phone when he stopped screaming at me and started talking about the orange flamingos taking his pants.”

Sheriff Deputy Steven Gordon arrived on the scene minutes later and attempted to reason with the sleep-walking Wrangle.

“The individual kept stating that the victim, Ms. Smyth, was making him look like a fool. My partner and myself attempted to reason with him until it became clear he was not fully cognizant. At that time, we decided to take utilize our tasers and subdue the individual.”

When reached for comment, Wrangle’s public attorney stated his client was sure that an act of infidelity occurred. According to the attorney, Wrangle saw Ms. Smyth and an unidentified man in mid-coitus on top of a unicorn at the local supermarket.

Pre-School Child Arrested For Attempted Murder After Sharing His Peanut Butter Sandwich With A Classmate

Posted on January 27, 2015 by JP

MESA, Arizona –

An 8-year-old boy will be facing life behind bars if found guilty of an attempted murder charge. The boy, Bryan Mills, was arrested at his elementary school early Monday afternoon, during a designated snack time. According to his teacher, Bryan shared his peanut butter and jelly sandwich with a fellow classmate, who happens to be deathly allergic to peanuts.

The school has a strict no-peanut policy that all students and parents are made aware of at the start of every year, and Bryan happened to have shared his “illegal” sandwich with the wrong boy.

The classmate, Joey Goldsmith, age 7, was taken immediately to a nearby hospital and was last listed as being in critical condition. Joey’s parents, Maureen and Gilbert Goldsmith, are claiming that all his classmates knew their son had a severe allergy, and that Bryan was out to get him.

“My son almost died, right there in that stupid school, because of one of his classmates. I won’t stand watching a potential murderer get any type of special treatment because of his age. I think he was jealous that our son didn’t invite him to his birthday party, and this is why he tried to kill him,” said Maureen Goldsmith.

According to a lawyer for the Goldsmiths, they feel that the Bryan is “crazy,” and will continue to share his lunch with other classmates with serious allergies. “Apparently this isn’t his first time in trouble for sharing food,” said Gilbert Goldsmith. “We also found at that last year, he shared a chocolate bar with a kid who was allergic to cocoa. Thankfully, a teacher caught that potential assault or murder before it could happen.”

Police are now investigating how the peanut butter and jelly sandwich made it into the elementary school with a full ban in effect. Theories range from the child smuggled it into the school, to his parents simply forgetting the rules and packing it for him for lunch.

Man Sentenced To Life In Prison After Littering

Posted on November 4, 2014 by JP

PLANO, Texas –

A man in Plano, Texas is looking at a life sentence in prison after a strange event occurred last September. Barry Lutz, age 34, is behind bars fighting for his freedom after being sentenced to jail for littering.

The events following the littering have currently given Lutz a life sentence, with no possibility of parole. A representative for Lutz is attempting to clear the air for him and change the drastic and unfair sentence handed down by judge Alvin Spenser.

“This is just the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen in all my years as a lawyer,” said Lutz’s lawyer Miles Jarlin. “This is just a ‘good ol’ boys’ kind of deal, because the incident involved a police officer who happens to play gold with the judge.”

“That insinuation is absurd,” said Judge Spenser. “I just hate littering, and I think the punishment, in this case, fits the crime perfectly. This will serve as a message to every other damn litterbug in the state of Texas.”

According to witness reports, the littering t took place on a local road in Plano, and most of the people say they think that this could have ended in a much brighter outcome.

While walking down his street, Lutz threw a crushed soda can on the ground, and an off duty police officer witnessed it, and demanded he throw it away. Lutz begrudgingly picked up the can and whipped it towards a public trash receptacle nearby. Unfortunately for Lutz, the can didn’t make it to the trash, as the wind took it and sent it flying directly into officer Jason Mills’ eye. The metal from crushed can punctured his retina, and doctors have confirmed that it would be a miracle if the officer ever regains vision in the eye.

While Lutz is claiming he was aiming for he trash to throw away the soda can, the now half-blind police officer testified in court that Lutz was aiming for him the entire time.

Lutz was convicted with assaulting an officer, attempted murder, and littering.