Feds Rule #BlackLivesMatter Protestors Are ‘Gangs,’ Can Be Arrested

black lives

WASHINGTON, D.C. – 

The federal government ruled this morning that the hashtag #BlackLivesMatter has become a serious problem for police and law enforcement, and that agencies now have the legal right to arrest and detain people who protest as part of the movement.

“The Black Lives Matter movement started as a tag on the internet. Something that went from social media about awareness of the brutality against African-Americans, to actual, living and breathing protests in the streets, in schools, and on TV,” said senator Joe McDonald (R-Georgia.) “That can’t happen. It’s one thing for people to say something online, it’s another completely to take those feelings public, and cause problems.”

McDonald says he brought the new law to congress after he saw several black people gathered together outside a police station in his hometown of Marietta, holding signs that read #BLACKLIVESMATTER.

“It’s disgusting, really, because when it comes down to it, black lives DON’T matter – not any more than white lives, or Asian lives, or any damn lives,” said McDonald. “What we’ve got here are angry black people getting angrier and angrier each time a white cop kills some black person anywhere in the country. It’s absurd. They didn’t know that person. They have no reason to get upset. I don’t get upset when a white guy I don’t know gets killed half way across the city, let alone across the country. Because we expect violence as this keeps happening, it was time to put a stop to it.”

President Obama reportedly backed the plan to disallow the #BlackLivesMatter hashtag from being used publicly, citing the fact that too many African-American children and teens could be hurt if more riots were to break out.

“I’d rather we use a new hashtag, #NoLivesMatter, to show that no one life is more important than any other,” said President Obama. “Black lives, white lives, the lives of police and firemen. The lives of cracked-out babies born to unwed, whore mothers – they are all important, and we should have one movement uniting them all.”

Law enforcement agencies are pushing the law to go a step further, and allow them to arrest people in their local area who use the BlackLivesMatter hashtag on social media, in the same way they can currently arrest people who discuss illegal or gang activity in public forums.

Miami Police Shoot, Kill 10-Year-Old Boy Who Had Toy Grenade Launcher

MIAMI, Florida – Miami Police Shoot, Kill 10-Year-Old Boy Who Had Toy Grenade Launcher

Miami-Dade Police have shot and killed a 10-year-old hispanic boy who was playing with what is now being described as a toy grenade launcher.

The shooting comes at a trying time for police, as there have been several deaths as the result of unnecessary and brutal police force throughout the country.

Miami-Dade Police Department spokesperson Felipe Cruz told members of the Miami Associated Press that the officer involved in the shooting has been suspended with pay until the investigation is complete.

“The boy, 10-year-old Miguel Rodriguez, was playing with a toy grenade launcher in his bedroom, when a neighbor across the street spotted him through the window and immediately called 911,” said Cruz. “When officers arrived on the scene and peeked through the bedroom window, they spotted Rodriguez aiming the giant, foam toy at several stuffed animals lined up on his bed, and this caused officer Tyrone Davis to make the difficult decision to discharge his weapon, which killed Miguel.”

“I can’t believe that this could happen,” said Carmen Rodriguez, Miguel’s mother. “I can understand our neighbor calling the police, because she’s a noisy bitch who likes to cause trouble, but when police arrived, they should have spoken to me first! I was just in the kitchen for crying out loud!”

The officer, whose name is not being released publicly due to fear of retaliation, commented on the situation through his Union representative. “If I had to do it all again, I would do it the same way,” explained the officer. “That boy was going to injure himself, or those stuffed animals, and I had to take charge of the situation. It’s what any good cop would have done.”

The shooting is very similar to the shooting of 12-year-old Tamir Rice of Cleveland, Ohio, but in that situation, he did not have a toy as indicated in earlier reports. Rice had been in possession of a pellet gun, which is legally not considered a toy.

Unfortunately, this incident is sure to cause mass-media exposure, as 2014 has been a very questionable year when it comes to the judgement of police officers across the nation.

Unarmed White Teen Killed By Black Police Officer – The Family’s Reaction Is Crazy!

NEW CANAAN, Connecticut – Unarmed White Teen Killed By Black Police Officer - The Family's Reaction Is Crazy

The news of policemen shooting unarmed teens continues this week in suburban Connecticut, as Phillip Macinaw Jr., 17,  was shot dead by police in the middle of a quiet street. Police say they incorrectly identified Macinaw as another teen they had been searching for who was thought to be involved in several home invasions.

Police reports show that the shooting happened after Macinaw was asked to hold up his hands, yet reached down into his waistband for what officers thought was a weapon. The object turned out to be a leather-bound date book filled with appointments, including fencing class and polo lessons.

The Macinaw family is distraught over the passing of their youngest son and are asking for their privacy, but were able to answer a few questions posed by media. When asked if they would be protesting the shooting, since their white son was killed by a black officer, Mrs. Macinaw dismissed it offhand.

“We all have jobs, and I head up the Charitable Women’s Society, so I don’t have a lot of time for the type of ‘protest’ you see on the news these days. Just because an incident involves people of different races doesn’t make it necessarily racist. I will be writing a letter to my Congressman about the level of training these officers receive, but I don’t believe I’ll be torching any police cars, no. My taxes helped buy them, after all,” said Charlene Macinaw, Phillip’s mother. “I helped allocate the monies for the town hall at the citizens meeting. I suppose when you aren’t paying for the infrastructure it must be easier to burn it down.”

Phillip Sr., despite the visible tears, was sympathetic to the officers involved.

“Phil wasn’t always the best listener. He had his flaws. I’m sure he ignored their warnings. I just feel terrible for these men who have to live the rest of their lives knowing that they took a life that didn’t need to be taken. These things aren’t always rational, but it is the civilized thing to do to keep a cool head. I may put in a stern letter to the Chief, but when you look at this like someone who has a little bit of sense, you see that nothing, no level of reaction, will bring your loved one back. You just have to learn how to cope instead of acting out and projecting.”

The identities of the officers involved in the shooting have not been released publicly. The police department has offered their deepest sympathies to the Macinaw family.

N. Dakota Town Passes New Law; Dogs That Attack Will Be Shot In Front Of Owners

WEST CARBON, North Dakota – City Passes New Law; Dogs That Attack Will Be Shot In Front Of Owners

A small town in North Dakota has recently passed a law that does not bode well with animal rights activists. In response to an increased number of dog attacks in 2014, West Carbon has passed a law requiring any dog that attacks or shows aggression – whether it be towards a human or another animal – to be shot, execution style, in front of its owners.

According to West Carbon police records, 53 dogs have been ‘put down’ in front of their owners since the law went into effect mid-2014. The most recent execution was Roxanne, a Blue Heeler owned by the McYoung family. According to Daniel McYoung, police shot Roxanne in the family’s living room after neighbors reported that they saw her biting the feet of Rusty, the McYoung’s other dog in the family’s backyard.

“This whole thing is ridiculous, Roxanne wasn’t biting or attacking Rusty, she was nipping at his heels, that’s what she does, she is a Heeler for god’s sake! The worst part of the whole incident is that the police insisted upon shooting the dog in our living room, and then did not offer to help clean up the mess they made,” said Daniel McYoung. He says that, thankfully, the one their 12-year-old daughter had been at a friend’s house for a sleepover when the police arrived.

Chief Wiggler from West Carbon Police Department publicly responded to Daniel McYoung’s statement by saying “The breed of dog is irrelevant, the dog was biting another dog, and in my book that’s an attack. In addition, the McYoung’s neighbor was of the opinion that Roxanne was attacking the other dog. People need to understand that when it comes to the law, perception is reality.”

Wiggler finished his press release by saying, “We insisted upon resolving the issue in the McYoung’s living room because it was a Saturday afternoon, and we did not want to cause a scene publicly by resolving it outdoors.”

Those that oppose the law say that it’s clearly an attempt for law enforcement to intimidate citizens, and that the law itself is inhumane.

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