Woman Arrested After Burning Down Her Own House In Attempt To Meet ‘Sexy Firemen’

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womanBOISE, Idaho – 

A Boise woman, Doris Murphy, 48, was arrested late Friday evening for arson after she allegedly burned down her own home in an attempt to meet ‘sexy firemen.’

“I just wanted to get me a little some, and I am damn sick of the same old haggard bastards who sit down at the bar,” said Murphy. “I seen me a bunch of sexy firemen in calendars, and I figure there had to be at least one or two who worked here in Boise. I didn’t think the house was going to go up that fast.”

According to Murphy, she just planned on setting a “small fire” so that she could call 911 and have local fire & rescue show up.

“I put a can of gasoline in the bathtub, and I torched it. Figured it was in the tub, it would be easy to just turn the shower on myself to stop it if I needed to,” said Murphy. “Turns out, that doesn’t work so good.”

Murphy’s home was completely destroyed in the blaze, and Murphy herself is facing up to 5 years in prison for the stunt.

“Most annoying thing is that there weren’t no good looking guys that came to put out the fire,” said Murphy. “It was just a couple of the same old guys who are always at the bar, and a beefy lesbian. Hell, there weren’t even no Dalmatian dog that came like in the TV shows.”

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