Gizmo Files Lawsuit Against Disney Over ‘Baby Yoda’, Claims Company Stole His Likeness

Posted on January 12, 2020 by Bob The Empire News Potato

LOS ANGELES, California –

Gremlins star Gizmo has filed a lawsuit in a Los Angeles superior court against Disney over their latest viral property, “Baby Yoda,” also known as The Child, from the hit Disney+ series The Mandalorian. Gizmo claims that Disney stole his likeness when they created the cute, cuddly character.

“My client is clearly the basis for the new Disney character affectionately known as Baby Yoda, and designers at Disney knew exactly what they were doing when they developed The Child’s final form,” said lawyer Chris Dante, who is representing Gizmo. “We are seeking damages for the extreme distress, loss of work, and emotional turmoil that Baby Yoda has caused my client. I am confident we have a strong case.”

Lawyers for Disney could not be reached for comment, but an anonymous employee who works on The Mandalorian said that there were draft notes that indicated Disney executives “very much” wanted to have a new character that “was 50% Yoda, 50% Gizmo, and 100% adorable.”

Gizmo first rose to fame in 1984 with his starring role in the Christmas-themed horror film Gremilins.

New ‘Avengers: Infinity War’ Film To Be Pulled From U.S. Theatres Over Protests About Movie’s Content

Posted on April 29, 2018 by Bob The Empire News Potato

LOS ANGELES, California –

Studios often test films with audiences before they are officially released, and apparently, Disney is wishing they did that
after ‘Avengers: Infinity War’ received a myriad of complaints over the film’s content and shocking ending.

“Everyone knows that it is with major regret that we have to inform everyone that we are pulling the film from theatres by the very end of this week,” said Disney spokesperson Margaret Lambert. “Protests over the film’s content has been a cause for everyone’s concern, and we are in the process of deciding how it should be handled. In the interim, we have decided to pull releases from across the country.”

Yesterday Disney releases a statement stating that over 2 million letters and emails have come into the studio headquarters, one thousand or so even demanding refunds over the graphic content near the end of the film.

“Now, we go to see all these Marvel movies together, but I never expected anything like this,” said Michelle Willard, who excitedly brought her 9-year-old son to see the film on Friday. “My son saw what was happening on screen, and his jaw dropped, and he began crying,” “He has been inconsolable ever since. I cannot get him to stop crying and shaking. The ending is too much for children, and likely, even some adults.”

Even though the movie brought in nearly $700 million dollars worldwide, breaking nearly every record, Lambert says the studio has no qualms about pulling the movie for a while, and deciding what their next move is.

Disney Plans Reboot of Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Posted on May 31, 2017 by Bob The Empire News Potato

LOS ANGELES, California –

In what will be the quickest turn around for a remake in Hollywood history, Disney has announced plans to begin shooting a remake of their popular 2016 Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

“We made such a huge pile of money from that film, but there is always more to milk out of people,” said Disney spokesman George Richards. “We didn’t spend a billion dollars buying this property to let it sit. The script is being re-written, and the cast is being chosen as we speak. It’s going to be huge!”

The remake, which will be shot concurrently with the other films currently in production in the Star Wars universe, begins shooting this summer, with plans for a late 2018 release date. It will be the quickest any film has ever been remade by a major Hollywood studio.

“We are looking forward to re-breaking records with this release,” said Richards. “People say we’re out of ideas, but we’re not out of ideas – we just like to do the same things over and over again because people don’t like change! It will prove that undoubtedly when this movie goes on to make billions at the box office.”

Activists Protest Alligator Euthanasia; Parents Of Snatched Toddler Accused Of ‘Letting It Happen’

Posted on June 15, 2016 by Bob The Empire News Potato

ORLANDO, Florida –

Some 50 wildlife specialists — including a trained alligator trapper — are combing a lake Wednesday at a Disney World resort hotel looking for a 2-year-old boy who was snatched by a seven or eight-foot alligator while wading on the beach. The boy was grabbed Tuesday evening while playing in about a foot of water at the Seven Seas Lagoon at the Grand Floridian Hotel with his father Tuesday evening.

Four alligators have been removed from the lagoon and are being tested for human remains, after being euthanized. Activists are protesting the actions of the Florida Fish and Wildlife agency, saying that innocent alligators should not be sacrificed to recover remains of the toddler.

National Wildlife Refuge Association (NWRA) representative, Shawn Powers blames the parents. “I am sickened by the attack on alligators following the tragic loss of the toddler at Disney. First it was the Cincinnati Zoo gorilla and now these innocent alligators. People are invading their habitats. That boy had no place in the gorilla pen, and these shouldn’t have let that toddler near the lagoon. There were signs saying ‘no swimming,’ but they let the boy play in the water anyway. I think they let it happen. They let the boy get taken by the alligator. It’s sick what people will do for 15 minutes of fame, and think of all the money they stand to make on their GoFundMe page.”

Others say all alligators should be exterminated. Although the species was endangered a few years ago, the population has exploded to 1.5 million gators. “This was a man made lagoon,” says Orange County Sheriff Jerry Demings. “Gators have no respect for borders. They’re worse than the damn Cubans that way.”

Walt Disney World has been aiding in the search. Although they took all conceivable precautions, and do not admit accountability, they will be offering an all expenses paid trip for the family to Disney Land. “We understand they will probably not want to visit Disney World again, after the tragedy, but we would like to give their family the opportunity to make new memories at Disney Land, a later date. Our thoughts are with the family at this time,” says Disney representative Michelle Broder Van Dyke.

8-Year-Old Fakes Cancer To Scam Make-A-Wish Foundation

Posted on February 26, 2016 by Bob The Empire News Potato

ATLANTA, Georgia –

A family in Atlanta convinced their 8-year-old son to go along with faking cancer to get a free trip to Disneyland, say police.

The Marques family, including Mary and Lewis Marques, both 34, and their son, 8-year-old Henry, reportedly visited doctors for over 2 years in the Atlanta area, faking symptoms of severe sickness in hopes of getting a free trip to Florida through the Make-A-Wish foundation.

“The Marques family had a very sophisticated way of doing things, in that they would constantly research rare cancer types, visit a doctor in one area, then falsify medical records, and then visit doctors in another area, using the names and locations of the previous doctor,” said police detective Mario Ferreira. “It was all an extremely elaborate scheme. The amount of time they put into it was intense. At the center of it all, of course, was 8-year-old Henry.”

According to the family, the entire scam was Henry’s idea. He was watching an episode of the TV show House on cable, and asked his mother where they found all the sick people to be in the show. When they explained that everyone, including the children on the show, were all just pretending, Henry asked if he could pretend to be sick and get on TV.

“Henry would not stop hounding us about the kids pretending to be sick. Eventually, we relented, and told him that no, we probably couldn’t get him on TV, but we might be able to get him to meet Mickey and Goofy,” said Lewis Marques. “But he had to promise to never reveal his secret – that he was totally healthy.”

Unfortunately, the secret was revealed after the Make-A-Wish foundation was contacted, as the group often does their own medical check-ups on children. It was then they discovered that Henry was perfectly healthy.

“I’m really sorry for what I did, but I just wanted to be famous!” said Henry. “And then I found out I could meet Mickey, and that seemed so cool. I don’t have any cancers at all, but I do get a cold sometimes. Will that help me go to Disney?

Snake Bites Boy At Disney’s Wild Animal Kingdom

Posted on January 30, 2016 by Bob The Empire News Potato

ORLANDO, Florida –

A family from Alabama plans to sue Disney World after they said an escaped snake at Disney’s Wild Animal Kingdom dropped from a tree and bit their young child. The family’s attorney, Matt Morgan, said Thursday that the boy’s grandmother saw the snake bite him, went into cardiac arrest from fright, and died soon after. They boy was treated with a band-aid and continued to enjoy the park after the incident.

While the family mourns her death, they say they will remember Grandma’s sacrifice as they spend the money they will receive from this lawsuit. “She would have said, ‘I’m old. I lived my life. Let God take me if it means my family can go on more memorable vacations.’ Next time we won’t be going anywhere with snakes though,” said one of the family members. The names are not being released at this time.

Disney says the snake was wild and not part of their attraction. Attorney Jeff Kendell plans to represent the snake, who did not intend to harm the boy. “The snake was nonvenomous, so it did not plan to hurt anyone. It was merely speaking out about the destruction of its wild habitat for a tourist destination in the only way it knew how.”

‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens’ Becomes First Film To Make $100 Billion Dollars At Box Office

Posted on December 27, 2015 by Bob The Empire News Potato

HOLLYWOOD, California –

Star Wars fever has hit the world hard, after the latest installment, The Force Awakens, has crossed the $100 billion dollar mark in worldwide grosses, blowing away the previous box office champ, Avatar, which grossed only about $2.5 billion.

“Honestly, I’m shocked that the movie did so well,” said the director, JJ Abrams. “No one seemed to care too much when I reinvigorated Star Trek, so I didn’t have super high hopes for Force. Plus, all we really did was remake the first film, so seriously, it’s crazy that people are plopping down money to see it 15 or 20 times.”

Based on worldwide grosses, the studio behind the film, Disney, says that they estimate that every single human being currently alive on the planet has seen the film at least once, and that several babies – who won’t even be born until the new year – may have already seen it as well.

“It’s really the only way the film could have done so much money,” said Disney CEO Mike Laird. “I mean, think about it like this. Titanic was the number one film at the box office for almost a dozen years, at just over 2 billion dollars. Then Avatar knocks that out with just under 3 billion. And now, here comes Force, which brings in a whopping $100 billion? I mean, that’s insane, right? There are 8 billion people in the world, and with average ticket prices at around $12, that means everyone, everywhere has seen the movie.”

Although those numbers add up, that’s likely not the case, according to box office analysts.

“More likely, it’s the same handful of nerds who’ve gone and see the movie 40 or 50 times in IMAX, which have ticket prices closer to the $20 range,” said Box Office Mojo writer Gil Morrison. “I can honestly say I haven’t seen it, and probably never will. I mean shit, who cares?”

Man Dies Of Hypothermia Waiting In Line For New ‘Star Wars’ Film

Posted on December 16, 2015 by Bob The Empire News Potato

BOSTON, Massachusetts –

A Boston man has died after reportedly suffering from hypothermia while waiting in line for the new Star Wars movie, which opens this weekend in theaters.

The man, Chuck Conway, 29, had been sleeping outside of the AMC Theater in downtown Boston since Sunday evening, trying to be the first in line.

“We saw him line up outside the doors on Sunday afternoon. He came prepared with a sleeping bag, a tent, and some books to read,” said AMC theater manager Joe Goldsmith. “We couldn’t believe he’d get here that early. It was insane.”

Friends say that Conway was a Star Wars super fan, and that he’d spent most of the year saving up to be able to afford to take time off from his job at McDonald’s and wait in line.

“Chuck was a hell of a guy, but not very bright, really,” said friend and co-worker Mitch Jacobs. “I mean, the tickets went on sale months ago, and he already had a ticket. Hell, AMC even makes you pick your seat ahead of time, so there was literally no reason for him to go stand in line. It’s a real shame he died over something so menial and stupid. But hey, more hours for me at work, right?”

Disney, the company releasing Star Wars: The Force Awakens said in a public comment that it was “tragic” that a fan had died, but offered no sympathy. AMC Theaters said they would offer a memorial service for Chuck at one of their locations, and that any who wanted to attend could get in for the matinee discount rate.

Walt Disney’s Cryogenically Frozen Body To Be ‘Thawed’ Next Year on 50-Year Anniversary Of Death

Posted on October 25, 2015 by Bob The Empire News Potato

MIAMI, Florida –

In 1966, one of the most famous men of the modern era passed away from lung cancer. Walt Disney is universally known for his animation and film studio, which over the years has provided many beloved children’s films.

When he died, Disney was one of the wealthiest men in the world. His final wishes were to have his body cryogenically frozen and placed in a vault underneath Cinderella’s castle in Disney World. According to his will, it was set to be kept there for 50 years, and at that point he wanted to be ‘thawed’ out.

“We have denied the rumors for many years, but it is true that Walt Disney had himself cryogenically frozen and placed under the castle,” said Walt Disney World president Marc Jacobs. “It was Mr. Disney’s wish that on the 50th anniversary of his death, we unfreeze him, and attempt to revive his body.”

According to Disney’s will, he chose the 50th anniversary of his death, because he believed that would be ample time for doctors to have cured lung cancer.

“Of course, sadly for him, Mr. Disney was wrong, and there is still no cure for cancer,” said Jacobs. “On the plus side, though, doctors have been able to do full lung transplants, so when we revive him, it’s possible that he could live with a new set of lungs. We have really high hopes that the procedure will be a success.”

The plan from the Walt Disney Company is to thaw Disney’s frozen body on December 15th, 2016, exactly 50 years since his death.

“We hav

New ‘Star Wars’ Film Gets Release Date Pushed To June 2016

Posted on October 23, 2015 by Bob The Empire News Potato

LOS ANGELES, California –

Disney Co., the parent company behind the new Star Wars franchise, has announced that they will be pushing the release date for the film back several months, from December of this year to June of 2016. The move comes as part of a “cooling off” period after several suicides were reported after the trailer for the film was released last week.

“Between the suicides over African-American actors being cast in lead roles, and the protests over our apparent ‘racism’ by not having as many white actors as in previous films, we decided it best to re-shoot several of the film’s key moments,” said Disney CEO Mark Ruben. “We want every Star Wars fan to be as happy and proud of this film as we are, so with that in mind, we go back into production next week.”

According to Ruben, the film will contain several new, Caucasian characters that were not in the version that was planned for release in December.

“We originally tried to not white-wash the galaxy far, far away, but now, it seems that some changes need to be made,” said Ruben. “We will be working closely with the cast and director of The Force Awakens to make sure that the spirit of the film stays alive while we work in new characters and storylines.”

The film will go back into production next week, and shooting will take an additional 4 months. No word on whether this will also delay Episode VIII.