Competitive Eater Joey ‘Jaws’ Chestnut Dies Of Acute Acid Reflux

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VALLEJO, California –

World-famous competitive eater Joey “Jaws” Chestnut, a competitive eater who was currently ranked second in the world, has reportedly died from acute acid reflux, a disease he developed over a career of eating excessive amounts of food.

“Joey was in incredible health for a person who consumed hundreds of thousands of calories as if it was his job,” said Dr. Emmett Brown. “Unfortunately, despite his good health and the calories not causing him to be massively overweight, the one thing he could not get past was his horrible case of acid reflux disease, which he contracted after a particularly difficult challenge of eating the World’s Hottest Hot Wings in 2011.”

Joey Chestnut had competed, and won, the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Challenge multiple years, as well as many other challenges, including hot wings, meatballs, pizza, and an entire turkey dinner.

“Joey was a God to me,” said up-and-coming competitive eater Kimball Rowell. “I competed against him once in a pizza eating contest, and I ate 4 slices in 2 minutes. He ate 3 full pizzas. The man is a legend, and his legacy will last a lifetime.”

Chestnut was scheduled to compete this summer at the Nathan’s Hot Dog contest once again, where he hoped to regain his title as world champion.

Man Dies From Spontaneous Combustion After Eating Record 107 White Castle Hamburgers

COLUMBUS, Ohio – Man Dies From Spontaneous Combustion Hours After Eating Record 107 White Castle Hamburgers

In an extremely bizarre incident, a 35-year-old man from Radcliff, Kentucky has died from the medical phenomenon known as Spontaneous Human Combustion (SHC) while staying at a Holiday Inn in Columbus, Ohio, just hours after breaking the world record for most White Castle hamburgers eaten at a competitive eating competition, sponsored by the organization known as Major League Eating.

Raymond Carter Fitzgerald traveled to Columbus from Kentucky to compete in the 34th annual National White Castle Hamburger Eating Challenge, which took place yesterday afternoon at Ohio State University. Fitzgerald went on to break Joey Chestnuts record of 103 White Castles eaten in 8 minutes by consuming 107 burgers in just under 7 minutes. What happened just 4 hours later has puzzled and shocked medical experts, while proving ultimately tragic for friends and relatives of Fitzgerald.

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Fitzgerald’s girlfriend, Molly Owenton, also of Radcliff, Kentucky, told police she returned to their hotel room at about 11:15 pm after making a trip to a local Walgreens to pick up a bottle of Pepto Bismol, stating that Fitzgerald had been complaining of excruciating abdominal pain and gas, when she terrifyingly discovered the deceased body of her beloved, which was still smoldering and smoking when she arrived.

Columbus Police Department spokesperson Edward Stanton told members of the Associated Press that it was a gruesome scene.

“Upon entering the hotel room of Mr. Fitzgerald and Ms. Owenton, police officers reported that the offensive smell was so overpowering that several officers retreated to their squad cars to retrieve their police-issued gas masks. The body of Mr. Fitzgerald continued to smolder for hours. His hands and feet were completely burned off, almost as if he had been electrocuted,” Stanton said. “After hours of investigating, our forensic expert declared that this was, indeed, a very rare case of what is known as Spontaneous Human Combustion. It was also decided that there was no apparent external source of ignition, and the body somehow ignited itself from within. At this time, and after interviewing Ms. Owenton, officials speculate that the build up of gas in the abdomen was most likely the culprit.”

When asked about the case, White Castle management expressed their condolences to the family and friends of Mr. Fitzgerald, and added that they would undoubtedly be sending out White Castle gift certificates to the family for the holidays.

Officials have stated that the case, and its investigation, are ongoing, as police correspond with scientific experts from Ohio State University. Foul play is not suspected.

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