Snapchat Is Secretly Storing Every Picture That’s Taken – And Then Selling Them On The Black Market!

Posted on June 28, 2017 by Bob The Empire News Potato

VENICE, California –

A hacker who goes by the name of Mr. Kitty has reportedly stumbled across code in the Snapchat app that proves that the company is storing every single picture that is taken on the app, but what he says they are doing with it is BEYOND terrifying.

“Snapchat is secretly storing every single picture taken. Whether it is a funny picture of your dog, a picture of your dinner, a comedic video, or nude pictures you’re sending to your boyfriend, Snapchat is saving them all,” said Mr. Kitty. “After I discovered this, I accessed their servers, which are some of the largest I have ever seen. It was there I discovered that they take the pictures, and send them to individuals and companies all over the world, for a profit.”

Mr. Kitty believes that the images are worth millions of dollars, because they can lead directly to marketing opportunities to help companies sell to individuals. The other side, of course, is black market pornography.

“There is an entire world of underground porn that is made up of pictures and videos from Snapchat,” said Mr. Kitty. “If you have ever taken a picture of yourself naked with the app, chances are good that you’re being sold in the underground.”

Snapchat said that they had “no idea” what Mr. Kitty was talking about, and that the app clearly does not store any pictures.

“We have been asked this billions of times and no, we keep nothing,” said a Snapchat spokesman. “It would defeat the purpose if we did. Obviously the app was created, originally, with the intent to send nudes, but now we’re a publicly traded company. We can’t afford to screw that up just by selling pictures of your chicken dinner to the black market.”

Dad Arrested For Accidently Sending His Daughter A Picture Of His Penis

Posted on July 14, 2015 by JP

SEATTLE, Washington –

A father of 3 is facing jail time for indecency after accidentally sending his daughter a picture that was meant to go to a female friend.

James Osborne, age 36, sent a picture of his erect penis to his 14-year-old daughter and, after she told her mother, Osborne was arrested and questioned by local police. Osborne has been divorced to his wife for 7 years, but says he still plays a “big, thick part” in their lives. He told police he was unaware that he even made the “silly, veiny” mistake until he was arrested, and claims if his daughter came to him first he could have explained the gaffe.

“It was just a mix-up. This kind of thing happens all the time, really. I mean, my wife divorced me because she found a whole cache of images I had mistakenly texted to my secretary when I meant to text them to her. They had the same name, though, so it was really not my fault. That’s what happened here, too – my daughter’s name is Kelly, and the woman I am seeing is also named Kelly, so it was really just a mistake. A simple boner, if you will,” said Osborne. “It’s really my bitch ex-wife’s fault that everything is just getting so damn hard for me now.”

“This will teach him to take dick pics for every tramp he meets,” said Osborne’s ex-wife, Nancy. “Sadly, we’re going to be paying for Kelly’s therapy for quite some time. I don’t think she’s bound to just get over this any time soon. Hopefully this will teach the bastard to stick to taking pictures of his meals for Instagram, and not that sad excuse for a penis.”

Local police say that “insext” crimes are looked at just as seriously as actual incest crimes, and that this is the 34th case they’ve had of a parent texting images of their genitals to their children this month.

Snapchat Adds New Feature For Adults Users To Send Nudes, Will Block Underage Sexting

Posted on April 17, 2015 by Bob The Empire News Potato

SILICON VALLEY, California –

Snapchat, one of the most popular apps for Android and iPhone devices allows you to send a picture or text to someone who has up to 10 seconds to view it, before it is immediately deleted. The service, which was clearly designed for its users to send nudes back and forth, has fought through scandal in the past, as a hack found that the company was storing images on its servers. Many pictures were stolen and leaked to the internet, some of them quite risqué.

After several recent updates that added new options and emojis, Snapchat is set to launch another new feature – a separate section for ‘adults only,’ verified through a snap you send holding your ID next to your face, which will allow its users to send nude photos back and forth, and also be ‘tipped’ via coins which can be transitioned to real money, much like pornographic webcam services.

“This plan is fool proof,” said Snapchat spokesman Sam Clip. “With our new system, kids will no longer be able to send nudes. We are going to actually implement a software that will not allow someone to send a naked image if they have not sent us a snap of them proving their age. If they are under 18, the snap will automatically fail if they try and send it and any penises, breasts, or vaginas are visible. The software is so good, it will even block out a picture taken of another picture of nudity, whether it be in porn or of art.”

Young Snapchat users say that they are very disappointed that the service will no longer be allowing them to send nudes to their friends.

“I sent pics of my tits to like, every boy in my class,” said sophomore Meghan from Georgia. “I want them all to see how great I look naked. The more boys that see me naked, the more I’ll be popular in school. All my friends do it. Well, at least we did until this new update was announced. How are we going to get to be popular now? I guess I’ll just show them in person instead.”

Most parents say that they are happy that Snapchat is taking measures to protect the safety of their children.

“I bought my 12-year-old son a phone, and I expect the app companies to make sure he uses it properly,” said Marie Jacobs of Arizona. “If my Freddy is sending out…dick pics…then Snapchat should stop him. I don’t want him to lose any chance at a life because pictures of his little wiener are out in the ether and on the web.”

Snapchat is expected to roll out the update by the end of April.

Jared Leto Says Justin Bieber Won’t Stop Sending Him Dirty Texts, Snapchat Pictures

Posted on January 7, 2015 by Raoul Stockton

LOS ANGELES, California –

While being interviewed by WKYL-FM Los Angeles radio talk show host Jenny McIntyre, actor and musician Jared Leto made a shocking statement when asked about obsessed fans. “Justin Bieber is my most obsessed fan, by far. Of all the guys who look up to me and the girls that are into me, Bieber is the worst. That dude will not leave me alone,” Leto said during the interview.

McIntyre laughed, assuming that Leto was just joking, but Leto said he was very serious, and has been trying for months to get Bieber to stop texting him.

“No, I am as serious as a heart attack. We met literally one time, and I gave him my number and was like ‘hey, we should hang out, get some drinks sometime.’ I guess he took it the wrong way,” Leto said. “So ever since then, he calls me at least three or four times a day. I don’t answer, so he texts. There have been a few days where he’s sent me over 200 texts or pictures.”

The star, known for films such as Requiem For a Dream and The Dallas Buyers Club (which earned him his first Oscar), is also the frontman for alternative rock outfit 30 Seconds To Mars. He said that he was just trying to be polite when he met Bieber at a concert last year, and didn’t think the pop singer would even contact him.

“When he did text me the first time, I really was going to hang out with him,” said Leto. “It was just that our schedules didn’t line up, and I told him we would get it together eventually. I think he took that completely the wrong way, though. He started sending me pictures through snapchat. I’m a very progressive guy, but there are some things I really don’t want to see; If I wanted to check out Justin’s little Bieber, I’d Google it just like any normal teenage girl or sexually frustrated housewife.”

Bieber, who has been hounded by the media ever since Leto’s interview went viral, said that he doesn’t even know who Jared Leto is, but that it’s very possible he’s sent him nude pics, because he “sends them to everyone.”