Walmart Says That 50% of Items Bought as Christmas Gifts Were Returned

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BENTONVILLE, Arkansas – 

Walmart recently released information stating that for every gift purchase that was made through the holiday season, over 50% of the items were brought back to the store.

“People try really, really hard to make their loved ones happy, but as it turns out, most people don’t know crap from Crisco when it comes to presents, and they’d have been better off buying a gift card. All those presents? Yeah, the come right back,” said Walmart spokesman Mario Deluth.

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All the returns cause massive headaches for Walmart, the world’s largest retailer, because most of the products cannot be re-sold.

“We get boxes in that have been crushed, pissed on, items broke – you name it, we see it,” said Deluth. “Fact of the matter is, we take a loss on all those presents you buy unnecessarily, so if you wouldn’t mind, next time, just get a gift card or something.”

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