MENLO PARK, California –
CEO Mark Zuckerberg made an official announcement this morning, outlining the plans for Facebook’s new business model. According to reports, Facebook will start to charge for ‘Likes’ and ‘Shares’ in an effort to increase their already massive revenue.
“I know people aren’t going to like it at first, but I owe it to shareholders to keep increasing profits,” said Zuckerberg. ”Charging for users to Like and Share is just the next obvious step in the progression of the company. The good news is, that with a billion active users, we don’t have to charge a lot to make a lot. We are planning, currently, on 2 cents to Like something, and 5 cents to share. These numbers should more than double our revenue. Coming in the next several weeks, all users will see a notification, asking them to link a PayPal or Google Wallet account to their Facebook page.”
“We always said the service would remain free – but we never said anything about the separate things you can do with the service. But, just think how much more special you will feel when someone likes that stupid picture you posted of your dinner last night, knowing that it cost them a couple cents,” said the head of product development for Facebook, Joey Goldsmith. “Or maybe you made a witty comment, probably something you stole from Workaholics, but your buddy Joe shares it. That share just cost him a nickel, so it’s now obvious – You’re the man!”
“I tend to like lots of comments, including my own, each day,” said Facebook user Jorge Pell. “I don’t think being charged will slow me down, liking comments is what I’m about, a few bucks a day won’t get me to change my online lifestyle.”
“Personally, I love sharing funny animal videos – my friends call me ‘the funny animal video lady’,” said Debbie Ranch, who has had a Facebook page for just over 6 months. ”Sharing funny animal videos is my life, and it makes me feel good, so no amount of money will ever get me to stop.”
If the product continues to thrive, Zuckerberg says that next year, users can expect to pay 10 cents to leave comments on posts, and 15 to 25 cents for Facebook game privileges.