Obama Ask Congress To Approve Sale Of Alaska To Chinese Government, Hopes To Pay Off National Debt

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Obama Ask Congress To Approve Sale Of Alaska To Chinese Government, Hopes To Pay Off National Debt

WASHINGTON, D.C. –

President Obama shocked congress today when he announced that he has been secretly talking to the Chinese government about selling Alaska. Obama promised the sale of Alaska to the Chinese in hopes that he would be able to pay off the national debt. He also stated that he sees no logical reason why congress should not approve of it.

“For the past several months I’ve been secretly negotiating with President Xi Jinping of China,” announced President Obama. ”Alaska actually is a pretty expensive piece of land with all it’s gold and oil, and President Jinping is will to pay the value of our national debt, a little over 18 trillion, which we have come to figure is just only slight above 1 trillion over market value. With those numbers, even the most racist republicans can’t say that’s a bad deal.”

Obama says that although he feels that China being so close to the United States and Canada could later have disatrous effects, the ability to pay off completely the debt owed by the country would be an immense relief.

“When congress approves of the sale, our nation will be debt free, and that’s a good thing. Ever since I took office, all I have  heard is ‘national debt’ this, and ‘national debt’ that, and what am I going to do about it? Well, I did something, now it’s in the Republicans hands to finish the deal.” 

“I think it’s a great idea, as all of Obama’s ideas have been so far,” said Democrat Nancy Pelosi. ”I know that I never personally considered Alaska part of America anyway. The only people who live there are freedom loving gun nuts like Sarah Palin, and that’s not what America is about anymore.”

Not everyone shares the same optimism about the sale as President Obama and other democrats, though.

“Alaskans won’t stand for it, that’s for sure! We may be different, but we are not crazy,” said former Alaskan governer Sarah Palin. ”Who does Obama think he is? How about reducing the debt by spending less, that’s how we do it in the Palin household. I don’t think Obama could even balance his own checkbook, never mind clearing out our national debt!” 

“Theres not a chance in hell this will pass,” said Rep. John Boehner. ”The President is out of touch with reality. I wake up every day and say to myself:’ just two more years…just two more years…'”

 

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