Green Bay Packers Receivers Caught Using Battery Powered Gloves; Cobb, Nelson Face Lifetime Ban
November 16, 2014
NEW YORK CITY, New York - National Football League commissioner Roger Goodell announced this morning that after an undercover investigation, significant evidence has been uncovered suggesting that Green Bay Packers wide receivers Randall Cobb and Jordy ...
Jeopardy! Producers Claim Ken Jennings Cheated During His Epic Show Run
November 16, 2014
BURBANK, California - Ken Jennings, the longest-running Jeopardy! champion in the history of the game show, who won 74 straight Jeopardy games in a row, has been accused of cheating by producers of the popular series. ...
Kanye West Insists On Nobel Prize, Claims He ‘Brings Peace’ Everywhere He Goes
November 15, 2014
LOS ANGELES, California - Rapper, songwriter, record producer, director, fashion designer, entrepreneur and now - world's only chance for peace? Singer Kanye West has been on a rampage in the media the last several days, proclaiming that he ...
Pee-Wee Football Coach Encourages Fathers To Bully Their Sons, Says ‘It Will Make Them Better Athletes’
November 15, 2014
APPLEFORD, Alabama - Pee Wee football coach Rick Daggil is in hot water with his Appleford, Alabama community after allegations surfaced that he encouraging his players father’s to bully their sons in order to make ...
[NSFW] ‘Paper’ Magazine Releases Untouched Pictures From Kim Kardashian’s Photo Shoot
November 15, 2014
LONDON, England - Earlier this week, Paper Magazine published an article featuring Kim Kardashain, a woman who has become famous for being famous, completely nude. The article was titled, conveniently, Break the Internet, and has unironically showed up in ...
Wal-Mart Plans To Layoff Thousands of Employees If Federal Minimum Wage Is Raised
November 15, 2014
BENTONVILLE, Arkansas - Expect even longer lines at Wal-Mart this holiday season if the federal minimum wage is raised, as Wal-Mart executives say they plan to lay off thousands of workers if the bill finally makes ...
Morgue Delivers Living Baby From Pregnant Corpse
November 14, 2014
FREEDOM, New Hampshire - A woman who died in a car accident last week in New Hampshire gave funeral directors at a local morgue quite a scare this morning, after the staff discovered that the woman's baby, who ...
NY Giants Football Team Name Protested by ‘Little People’
November 14, 2014
EAST RUTHERFORD, New Jersey - It may be hard to see and you may look over it, but if you tilt your head down what you will see are angry little people. Little people ranging from ...