Secret Emails Reveal Hillary Only Running To Be Able To Have Affair In Oval Office

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Secret Emails Reveal Hillary Only Running To Be Able To Have Affair In Oval Office

WASHINGTON, D.C.  – 

A shocking set of emails were leaked on the internet this morning which seem to indicate a romantic fling between presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton, and an anonymous stranger. In the emails, Hillary indicates that she is only running for president so that when she wins, she can “take a pounding” on the resolute desk in the Oval Office, much as her husband, former president Bill Clinton, was said to do while serving in office.

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“Ohh…Billy thinks he’s the only one who can get some in the Oval Office? Screw him – I cannot wait to [expletive remove] your huge [expletive removed] with my tight [expletive removed] and my sopping wet [expletive removed],” read the email from Hillary’s private GMail email account. Responses included “mmm” and “Ohh yeah, Hills, tell me all about it, baby.” The anonymous emailer has not been identified. His email address is listed in the leak as 2Big4DatPoon6969@sexmail.com

Clinton’s handlers and campaign team say that the leaks are “completely fabricated” and that if they were real, they probably are “coming from the desk of her husband.”

“Former president Bill Clinton has a fun sense of humor, as well as some…kinks…and often likes to pretend he’s a random guy from the internet, hitting on his own wife,” said Clinton’s spokeswoman Gene Chandler. “We all have our sexual vices, that’s his. It’s really the private business of two consenting adults, and this leak is being researched.”

Bill Clinton, who was reached for comment at his family’s home in Arkansas, said that he doesn’t even know how to use emails, but that after being informed of their content, said that it was “pretty hot.”

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