In a surprise combined press conference Michele Bachmann (Rep. Minnesota) and Sarah Palin (ex-governor, ex-reality show star, ex-fox news correspondent, current star of the SarahPalin network) announced that they would be supporting each other for the republican presidential nomination in 2016.
“With 2016 being only two or maybe three years away, it’s time to announce our candidacy,” Bachmann announced to the crowd of nearly 50 eager supporters.
“We need to put the United States back on the path of rightness,” Palin said. “We need to stop this influx of immigrants. Everybody knows our great country wasn’t built on immigration!”
When questioned on how they could both support each other when in the end there can be only one nominee for president, the two ladies surprisingly had an answer.
“Whichever one of us gets the nomination for president will choose the other one for their running mate,” Bachmann said.
“Yes,” Palin agreed. “This way our country gets not only its first female president, but also our first female vice president. It’s like killing two moose with one shot.” Palin also noted that she has experience as a losing VP candidate, which she will be sure to pass on to Michele.
The two women both agreed that either of them would be a far superior president than Democratic front-runner Hillary Clinton.
“How does being Secretary of State even remotely make you qualified to be leader of this great country?” Palin asked. “My SarahPalin network, which costs a very reasonable $9.95 a month, has greatly prepared me to be President. After all, the president needs to know about the Internet and stuff and I know stuff,” Palin noted.
Bachmann practically snickered at the thought of an ex-Secretary of State becoming president, commenting that she didn’t even know that secretaries did anything other than take dictation.
“Secretaries are SO out of date. You would think she would at least be Administrative Assistant of state. What did she do? Bring coffee to the males of state?” Bachmann smiled proudly when she added, “I have my husband to bring me coffee.”