Christmas Carols Banned In NYC Schools Unless The Word ‘Christmas‘ Replaced With ‘Holiday’

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NEW YORK, New York – Christmas Carols Banned In NYC Schools Unless The World ‘Christmas‘ Replaced With ‘Holiday’

New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio just declared war on Christmas, and he’s making the children pay the price. NYC schools and chorus programs will have to change their Holiday shows to exclude songs with the word ‘Christmas’, or replace it with the word ‘Holiday’. 

”I don’t hate Christmas, but it’s not about me, it’s about the thousands of children that don’t celebrate Christmas, and could find it offensive,” said de Blasio. “New York has always been the great melting pot, and our Muslim population has never been higher. After receiving complaints from Muslim leaders I’ve decided to cave in, basically. It’s not that big of deal really – it’s the time of year our schools put on their Holiday band and chorus shows, so just leave out songs that have the word ‘Christmas’ in them, or replace the word ‘Christmas’ with ‘Holiday’.”

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“While we are at it, maybe it’s best not to have any songs with ‘Santa’ in them, either” said public school principal Mark DeWitt. “I agree whole-heartedly with the mayor on this decision. The important thing is not to offend anyone. ‘I’m dreaming of a white holiday’ is just as pretty as ‘white Christmas’. If we are all going to get along, we are going to have to change. And by ‘we’, I mean Americans are going to have to change.”  

“It’s insane! ‘White Holiday?’ ‘It’s Beginning To Look a Lot Like Holiday’? It’s just stupid,” said Chorus instructor Carmine Classi,” We need a Mayor with a backbone, this guy is so far left he makes Obama look like a conservative, this city is going right down the holiday shitter, if you ask me.”

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