LEXINGTON, Kentucky –
If you live in the Lexington-Fayette area and notice a strange smell coming from your mailbox, don’t attempt to get your mail. A mailman in the area has reportedly been arrested this week after being caught placing his own feces into several mailboxes on his normal route.
Peter Hill, age 45, was caught red-handed by a fellow mailman as he placed human excrement into a mailbox. Chief postal clerk Marion Dunn said she was completely taken aback when she saw Hill putting feces into mailboxes.
“The USPS had asked me to follow him, secretly, on his route one day,” said Dunn. “I did, and we didn’t make it past one house before [Hill] was squatting down, shitting on the ground, and then scooping it up and placing it in the mailbox. I followed him all day, and he did the same thing at 46 houses. To be honest, it was quite a feat. I know I can’t crap on demand like that.”
Hill tells Empire News that he wouldn’t change any of it, and would continue shitting in mailboxes even though he no longer works for the USPS.
“I don’t regret what I did at all, and to be honest I’m glad that I was arrested. It will give me plenty of free time to build up a bulk supply of feces. I was placing my poop in certain mailboxes of people I didn’t enjoy giving mail to. Some of the people left their dogs roam free and I would get attacked on the regular. Others would just do things that irked me like having messy front yards. I had to send a message, and I feel my message came across perfectly – you treat the mailman like shit, you get that right back in return,” said Hill