ATLANTA, Georgia –
The White Persons Movement, or WPM, is apparently very heated over a new commercial. Group President Peter Weinberg announced in his weekly press conference this morning that he has received a letter from group cabinet members stating that the ‘Game of War’ ads on the internet and television, which show off the busty, blonde, silky-skinned snowflake Kate Upton, are far ‘too sexy’ for men to handle, especially African-Americans.
“It is with love of our African-American brothers that we share our concern with the entire nation,” Weinberg said. “We here at the WAP are not racists, and we want to help our brown brethren. We know that most black men cannot resist the love of a busty white woman, and these ads go too far. Not to mention how mad their wives get when Upton’s breasts are dangerously close to exploding off television screens, computers and cell phones.”
Kim Kardashian-West has also spoke out against the advertisement recently. “I just think it is inappropriate, she has all her junk just poppin’ out. I mean really, like who does she think she is? She doesn’t even have a talent, does she?” Kardashian said . “It really pisses me off actually, everybody been talkin’ about her. I mean enough is enough, we are sick of you. A real woman doesn’t just put her stuff out there for the world to see.”
Even comedian Bill Cosby used the ads as material during a sold-out stand-up performance, “All I have to say is, Kate Upton! Now! Youuuu…seee…what I, as a black mannnnnn have to deal with? Bouncy, bouncy, Jello cups and Vanilla Puddin’ Pops! It is …ENOUGH…to drive a man to desperate measures! There is nothing as sexy as a good, healthy white woman!” Cosby explained with trademark silly faces.