Marvel Having Hard Time Finding Good Quote About ‘Avengers’ For Marketing Materials


HOLLYWOOD, California – 

Normally after a massive launch of a new film, the studio will find critics or reviewers who have said good things about their film, and use quotes to further market their movie. It is not uncommon to see new TV spots featuring these quotes, such as “AMAZING! – says New York Times” during prominent primetime viewing hours, urging people to see the movie.

According to an anonymous insider, though, Marvel Entertainment is having a very difficult time finding any positive reviews to use in new marketing for Avengers: Age of Ultron. 

“Normally, we’d have at least one critic who said it was ‘Awesome’ or ‘Amazing’ or whatever other generic adjective, and we could put that in a new TV ad or on some new posters, but we can’t find anyone who likes this movie,” said the anonymous source. “All the major reviews are coming in, and they’re all pretty blah. It’s not going to look very good if a new TV ad comes out, and it says ‘Go see Age of Ultron – It’s okay!”

Marvel has not commented publicly on the fact that they have no good reviews of their film, but many fans have noticed that there may be something up.

“Normally I drive by this giant billboard on the way to work, and there’s always an ad for the latest movie,” said Chicago resident Mario Levi. “Today there was an Avengers ad, but instead of the normal critics reviews, it just said ‘THE MOVIE WAS SO COOL! – @AvengersLover on Twitter.’ I don’t know who that is, but I’m guess he’s not a famous critic. I think I’ll save my fifteen bucks and watch it on Netflix in a couple months.”

Avengers: Age of Ultron opened in theatres May 1st, and is expected to have decent box office returns, without coming anywhere near the level of the first film.

‘Guardians of the Galaxy’ Breaks Box Office Records, Studio Announces Unprecedented 8 Sequels

HOLLYWOOD, California – 'Guardians of the Galaxy' Breaks Box Office Records, Studio Announces Unprecedented 8 Sequels

The new film Guardians of the Galaxy, based on a Marvel comic book about a group of rag-tag space-traveling misfits who join together to save the world, has broken numerous box office records since its release to theaters this past Friday, making it one of the highest-grossing films of all time, as well as one of the highest-grossing comic book films ever released. Executives for Marvel Studios, amazed at the film’s success, have already green-lit 8 sequels to the movie.

“We knew the movie would be a big summer hit with families, but we didn’t know that it was going to be this massive,” said Peter Dey, an executive at Marvel Studios. “No one even knew this comic book existed before we started releasing trailers for the movie. This proves how great marketing can really pack the butts in the seats.”

Even with its PG-13 rating for action, violence, and some crude-humor, theaters across the country were packed with children of all ages, many of whom were excited to see the film, despite not having ever read the comics.

“The previews looked good and funny,” said Brad Quill, age 9, who was seeing the movie in Los Angeles with his father. “I’ve never looked at the comics before. I am an Avengers fan more than anything. But this will do until we get another one of those movies.”

Despite not yet making back the $170 million dollars the film was budgeted, executives have already announced several sequels, and have been working with agents for all of the stars from the first film to get them to sign on for the next 8 films.

“We really want to make this a massive franchise. More movies, clothing, figures – you name it,” said Dey. “We need everyone to come back for the next movies, and we’re paying big money for them to do so.”

Insiders report that the studio is looking on spending almost $600 million dollars on the next film alone, with a reported $3 billion to be spent over the series as a whole.

The reviews for the film are almost universally amazing, another feat that is hard to pull off in this day-and-age, especially by a comic book film that doesn’t feature a main cast member that died before the film was released.

“Remember how bad X-Men Origins: Wolverine and Man of Steel were?” asked Dey. “This film is as good as those movies were bad. It will make you forget all about that atrocity of a Transformers movie you saw earlier this summer, that’s for sure.”

Marvel has said that the next GOTG film will be released in 2016, with another film following every 2 years after. The final film in the series will be released in July, 2030. Director James Gunn, known for absolutely nothing else before this major blockbuster of a film, has already signed on to continue with the series until it has ended.


Design & Developed By Open Source Technologies.