New Jay-Z Streaming Service ‘Tidal’ to Fulfill Goal of Making More Money for Jay-Z

New Jay-Z Streaming Service 'Tidal' to Fulfill Goal of Making More Money for Jay-Z

MIAMI, Florida – 

New music service, Tidal, has prided itself as being the first artist owned music streaming service. Sean “Jay-Z” Carter is the most prominent name on the list of owners, and reportedly the man who brought the service to popularity amongst other performers. The goal of the service is to make more money for Jay-Z and his brand.

“I make music. I love music. I make money. I love money,” said Jay-Z. “Therefore it makes sense to use this excellent service to pursue those things I love.”

Other names signed on as owners include Carter’s wife Beyonce, Rihanna, Kanye West and Madonna. And although their goals differ slightly from Carter’s, they’re all in it for a similar reason.

“I want to make money for Kanye West,” West is quoted as saying.

“I intend to make more millions for my brand,” Rihanna stated.

“Madonna needs more money. Madonna will get more money,” said Madonna.

Fans of the artists have announced that they are ready and willing to give their money to their favorite celebrities.

“I love giving money to Beyonce,” said fan Halle Coozen. “I’m always looking for new ways to do so, and this is just perfect. Just perfect!”

But cynics are criticizing Carter and company, saying that there are already enough ways to give them money, and Tidal will only detract from the integrity of those mediums.

“iTunes is a great way to pay artists and their labels,” said analyst Mansford Manfred. “I just think Tidal will mean that money that would be going through that channel will be channeled differently. It’s confusing for me. And I don’t want that to compromise my ability to pay the stars I love!”

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