CARLSON, Texas – 

Parents of Ricky Frappier never thought the boy’s favorite snack could be deadly. The 6-year-old boy allegedly got into the snack cabinet at nine in the morning on Friday before his parents had woken up. His mother, Celina, found him unconscious on the kitchen floor surrounded by more than twenty pop-tart wrappers and a mess of uneaten crust.

Celina promptly called 911, and EMTs suspected he had gone into a diabetic coma. “We didn’t know he even had the diabetes. Sure he was a little husky like me and his dad, but I figured a growth spurt was bound to clear that right up.” Social workers are concerned that he did not have a healthy diet, and Ms. Frappier has agreed to attend voluntary nutrition classes.

“What was I supposed to do, starve him? All he’ll eat is chicken nuggets, french fries, hot dogs, toast, and Pop-Tarts. I can’t stand it when he screams, so I just end up feedin’ him what he likes. Things are changing once he gets outta the hospital though. You bet your ass they are.”

The boy’s father, Bucky Rogers, says he’s seen this kind of thing before, but did not know it could happen to his son. “Had I known I would’ve put a pad lock on that damn snack cabinet. It’s like this goat we had when I was a kid. It got into its feed and just kept eating till he died.  We usually sleep till noon, and Ricky makes his own breakfast. I’m just glad Celina found him when she did. From now on, I’m keeping the snacks out of his reach so he doesn’t end up dead.”