57-Year-Old Virgin Sues His Former Middle School For Teaching Abstinence

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HUNTSVILLE, Alabama – 

James Holmes, 57, has filed a lawsuit against his former middle school for teaching him abstinence, as he said that they taught him that he would “burn in hell” if he ever had sex, or even masturbated.

From World News Daily Report:

Holmes says the sexual education he received at the Jemison High School was “traumatizing” and has caused him some severe psychological problems.

In an interview with ABC, he described the content of the sexual education classes which he says caused his psychological trauma.

“They taught us that God would smite us if we masturbated and that we would burn in Hell for eternity if we had sex before marriage. They showed us pictures of genitals infected with STDs and told us it was what God did to adulterers.”

These classes had such an impact on Mr. Holmes that whenever he thinks about sex, even today, he suffers from a severe panic attack.

“I’m 47-year old and I’m still a virgin. Every time I think of sex I remember these purulent genitals, so I start panicking, sweating and even vomiting.” 

In 2012, he was diagnosed with a Sexual aversion disorder (SAD), a disorder characterized by disgust, fear, revulsion, or lack of desire in consensual relationships involving genital contact.

This type of psychological disorder is usually caused by some traumatic event which causes sex to be associated with a painful experience.

He had to undergo years of psychotherapy and is still heavily medicated, that’s why he demanding almost half a million dollars from his former school.

Holmes’ lawyer says that he believes that the case is a “slam dunk.” Holmes claims that the first thing he plans to do after receiving his winnings is to pay a “lady of the night” to finally take his virginity, but he hopes that he can find a nice one so that afterwards he can settle down.

Hobby Lobby Adds ‘Abstinence Policy’ To Employee Handbooks

OKLAHOMA CITY, Oklahoma – Hobby Lobby Adds 'Abstinence Policy' To Employee Handbooks

Hobby Lobby is back in the spotlight today, after the company announced that they are adding new rule to their ‘Employee Code of Conduct,’ which will now include a passage that says the company expects all of their non-married workers to practice abstinence. The company is enacting the policy only a few short months after a media firestorm over their refusal to cover Plan B birth-control in their medical packages – a decision that was upheld by the Supreme Court in a landmark decision.

“Hobby Lobby is a private company, and we were founded on Christian values. Our employees have a choice, though –  They can embrace our values, or they are free to seek employment with a more secular company,” said Dick Red, Hobby Lobby spokesman. “In light of the backlash we took for our refusal to cover methods of ‘birth-control’ that we felt were more in line with ‘termination of pregnancy’ techniques, we have elected to take our Supreme Court victory a step further. Effective immediately, sexual activities outside of marriage by our employees will be grounds for termination. If a non-married employee becomes pregnant, she will be terminated so she can find her place with a new employer. If we catch any of our non-married employees having sex with each other on top of the paint brushes or balls of yarn, well then they’ll be terminated as well. Promiscuity is not a value that we here at Hobby Lobby are prepared to tolerate any longer.”

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Support for the policy has poured in from Christian Rights groups and religious individuals alike. Televangelist Joey Ostein touched on the controversial policy in a recent sermon.

“God has spoken, and this company [Hobby Lobby] has heeded the call. We have become a nation of deviants and harlots. We have spiraled into a nation of homosexuals and sinners. The Bible is clear on these issues. Sex is to be between a man and a woman inside the sacred bond of marriage. Brothers and sisters, we must strive to save these sinners, as Lot strove to save the Sodomites; but like Lot, if our words shall fall on deaf ears, we must turn our backs and let God’s will be done.”

Several employees have said they plan to file suit against Hobby Lobby, claiming religious discrimination, but Red is not worried.

“God saw us through the tribulations of our previous struggle, and He will see us through this one as well. These feminists, harlots, and menaces, they say that they only want to keep the government out of their vaginas. Well I say they can start by keeping everyone else out of their vaginas as well,” said Red. “At our stores, we are going to restore the Christian values that this country was founded on. If we lose a few customers in the process, then so be it. I would rather go out of business and see my Christian customers in Heaven than pander to the ideals of Satan and wind up peddling craft supplies in Hell.”

 

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