Man Sues Hooters After Getting Small-Breasted Waitress On Visit


MIAMI, Florida – 

Kyle Reese, 50, says that he is taking suit against a Hooters location in Miami, Florida, after a recent visit to the restaurant. According to Reese, he was assigned a “tiny-titted” waitress, and was refused service after he requested a girl with a “bigger rack.”

“As the great Chris Rock said, ‘No one goes to Hooters for wings,'” said Reese. “I went there, and I wanted to oogle. I have gone many times, and I always get good looking, stacked chicks. This time, I got some small-titted, timid girl. It’s not my type. I asked to be seated somewhere else, and they said no. Then they refused to serve me at all when I demanded a hotter girl.”

Management in the restaurant say that they had no choice but to ask Reese to leave after he began screaming about “tits and ass” inside the family establishment.

“We are a family-friendly place, and we had many other people eating at the time,” said manager Joel Silver. “This was not the kind of environment we want our other guests to have to deal with, so Mr. Reese was removed from the property.”

Reese is seeking $2 million dollars in damages, claiming that the restaurant falsely advertised their product.

Man Sues Hooters After Server’s Cleavage Triggers Heart Attack

Man Sues Hooters After Server's Cleavage Triggers Heart Attack


AUSTIN, Texas – 

Local Austin resident Jason Rittlestone was rushed to the hospital after an acute cardiac arrest at a local Hooters franchise. Now, the Texan says he is suing the franchise, citing a female employee’s bust as the reason for the attack.

“My client was simply trying to enjoy a meal, while simultaneously enjoying the partially bare chests of the female servers,” said Attorney Arum Silverman. “This particular employee has such an ample chest that, quite frankly, there should be a warning given to anyone that is to be served by her.”

According to eye witnesses, Rittlestone was in the midst of his fourth helping of hot wings when a young waitress, Cindy Thompson, approached him. Witnesses say Rittlestone looked to be in a state of shock, then doubling over out of his chair and onto the floor. He remained there until EMTs arrived on the scene.

Franchise owner Steven Balderama stood by his employee, and his restaurant. “We take pride in who we hire here at Hooters. Ms. Thompson came to us looking for employment, and we felt her talents far exceeded the prerequisites for hiring. She did nothing to provoke Mr. Rittlestone’s condition. The girl doesn’t even wear a push-up bra, for crying out loud.”

When asked about the incident, Thompson replied, “I just came over to offer him a refill on tea. When I came to his table, he got all bug-eyed and red in the face. All of a sudden, he leaned forward with his hands out. I screamed and backed away because I thought he was trying to grab me.”

The suit is expected to begin within two weeks, and there is expected to be a hard-fought battle. Rittlestone is expected to make a full recovery from the heart attack, although doctors say the fractured jaw and ruptured testicle he sustained after his wife discovered the circumstances of the incident could take several months to fully heal.

Man Plans Lawsuit Against Hooters, Claims Unequal Hiring and Employment Practices

MELROSE, Massachusetts – Man Plans Lawsuit Against Hooters, Claims Unequal Hiring and Employment Practices

George Emerson suffers from gynecomastia, a condition marked by the swelling of breast tissue in males. Thousands develop the condition, usually during puberty and as a result of hormonal imbalances. Many men opt for surgery to remove the excess tissue, but unlike other men diagnosed with the ailment, Emerson instead decided to keep his breasts and capitalize on them.

“I don’t want any invasive surgery,” he said, “and I was tired of hiding and binding my chest. One day I decided to put down the ace bandage, and slip into a loose-fitting shirt.  I felt free for the first time in my life.”

Emerson’s new freedom gave him a sense of confidence he had never before possessed. One day, while driving through the nearby town of Saugus, Emerson decided to test the limits of his empowerment. He marched into the local Hooters and asked if they’d consider hiring him as part of the wait staff. “I met the physical requirements of the job and I guess I was feeling a little bit daring,” he said. “Plus, I have years of server experience from back in high school and college.”

Emerson’s measurements were the equivalent of a women’s 34C. “They thought I was trying to prank them – like I was wearing a padded bra or something, so then I took off my shirt and ‘boom boom,’ there I was, or there they were I guess. That’s when they called the manager.”

Dick Rodman, manager of the Hooters, spoke with Emerson and explained that it wasn’t part of the corporate business model to hire males, as the trademark for Hooters is built right in with their name and logo, and is pretty self-explanatory.

“I said for them not to consider me was a form of discrimination, and a violation of equal hiring practices. The manager wasn’t convinced,” said Emerson. “He told me he didn’t want his restaurant to turn into some kind of freak show attraction, and that’s when I decided to hire a lawyer.”

Nancy Grace has booked Emerson for an upcoming appearance on HLN Network, and celebrity lawyer Gloria Allred has been contacted by Emerson for possible legal representation.

“This isn’t about me,” said Emerson. “It’s about the thousands of men who suffer with the stigma of gynecomastia. We’ve had to hide our shame under tight, restrictive garments and bulky layers of clothing. Instead of standing tall, we’ve lived in our own shadows of embarrassment. If I can convince just one full-figured guy to stand tall, chin held high and chest thrust forward, then my double-barreled efforts will not be in vain.”

Emerson’s case will begin mid-December, and he has decided to represent himself in court. Legal experts say that an out-of-court settlement amenable to both parties will most likely be reached.

Design & Developed By Open Source Technologies.