Lady Gaga Announces Retirement From Music, Plans To Join Religious Commune

Lady Gaga Announces Retirement From Music, Plans To Join Religious Commune

 

LAS VEGAS, Nevada – 

Lady Gaga announced this morning that she has plans to completely quit musical career, and focus on a career that is “more in line” with who she says she really is as a person.

“I have recently experienced a massive spiritual awakening, and the time has come for me to give up this industry, and focus on myself for awhile,” said Gaga, whose real name is Stefani Germanotta. “I have decided that I am going to leave music so that I may join a religious group.”

According to reporters, the community Gaga has chosen is called Children of The Rising Suns. The Children live on a small island in the Pacific Ocean. A millionaire named Robert Smith bought the island three years ago.

“I saw the sunbeams, I saw them everywhere, I understood there are thousands of suns in the galaxy, and all of them are gods. After this realization all my life has changed,” said Smith. Doctors suspected the sunbeams Smith saw actually indicated a severe form of brain damage. Despite of his family’s efforts though, Smith refused hospitalization and medical examinations. Instead, he spent a great part of his fortune to purchase the island and build a religious commune, one he seeks to fill with as many people as possible.

Gaga confessed that, after reading an article about the community, she felt that was the path she had to follow. “I know this is what I need to do. I am the daughter of the Sun. I don’t want a career anymore, no more pop shows, fake people, lights and latex. I will not stop singing, but from now on, each sound that comes out of me will be devoted to the Gods of Light. There is a chorus in the commune, the Sunny Chorus, and I will sing along with them.”

Desperate fans wrote a petition asking Gaga to play a farewell concert before she leaves. The petition, which can be signed on www.onemoretimeale-alejandro.com, has already been supported by 2 million fans. Gaga has made no comment about a final performance before joining The Children.

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