Britney Spears Wants Sons to Live ‘Normal Lives’ As Kids of Mega-Rich Celebrity

Britney Spears Wants Sons to Live 'Normal Lives' As Kids of Mega-Rich Celebrity

LAS VEGAS, Nevada – 

Britney Spears made entertainment news recently by going back to school – enrolling in math classes so that she would be able to help her sons with their difficult homework. She told E! Entertainment that all she wants is for her sons to lead the lives of regular boys who are children of a multimillionaire celebrity.

“It’s so important to me that their lives are no different to other kids their ages,” she said, “who have parents of major stardom. That’s why I’m ensuring that they get in the news for doing math homework. I heard Angelina [Jolie]’s kids are learning about the Civil War, and I didn’t want my boys to feel left out.”

The 33-year-old singer has two sons with ex-husband Kevin Federline – Sean,9, and Jayden James, 8. The brothers have been in the spotlight since before birth. It is expected that they grow into troubled teenagers, like many of their friends from celebrity families.

“Sean already feels a little let down by me I think,” said Spears. “He hasn’t had the amount of publicity that other children are getting, and that’s my fault. And perhaps I haven’t had enough issues lately, which would have made me self-involved and neglectful, like any good celebrity mother.”

Jayden, however, has led a life like other famous-by-association boys of his age, and Britney is not worried about his prospects in the public eye.

“He has followers on Twitter, I posted pics of him being breastfed and taking baths, I did all that stuff so he would fit in. The paparazzi know everything about him and make his life as claustrophobic as should be expected for the son of an award-winning artist.”

Kevin Federline, the boys’ father and Spears’ ex-husband, acknowledged that Britney is doing a good job raising their children.

“I approve of how she’s handled it. They’re going to rival the best of the celebrity kids.”

Justin Timberlake Buys Britney Spears’ Underwear At Auction; Jessica Biel Reportedly Files For Divorce

Justin Timberlake Buys Britney Spears' Underwear At Auction; Jessica Biel Reportedly Files For Divorce

HOLLYWOOD, California –

The underwear Britney Spears wore in her hit 1998 video Baby One More Time recently sold at a charity auction for $60,000, and the buyer has been rumored to be Spears’ ex-boyfriend, Justin Timberlake. Timberlake’s wife, actress Jessica Biel, has reportedly filed for divorce, citing the purchase of the underwear as the reason. 

“I don’t know why she’s so pissed,” said Timberlake. ”Those panties just bring back good memories of my youth. They were the same panties she wore the first time we did it. I couldn’t bare the thought of someone else owning them. More importantly, though, it was for charity, and I can afford it. Britney and I will always have the past, but Jessica is my future!” 

“On his head! I caught him wearing that skank’s panties on his head!” said Biel. ”I’m having his baby, I’m fat, I’m irritable, and I find him naked singing ‘Hit me baby one more time!’ with those panties on his head in the bedroom. I mean, I know it could have been worse. There are some much more disturbing things he could have been doing with those panties. Oh God – now I’m thinking about all those things! I can’t take this anymore!”

“Justin really wanted those panties, and my sources tell me the bid was only $100 when he upped it to $60,000,” said Hollywood reporter Mitch Mitchell. “The divorce is big news, but no one wants to take sides here. Justin has already been to Vegas twice to see Britney’s show. I think Justin will be just fine, here. As far as Jessica goes, well, I’m sure that if her body bounces back quickly, she’s set for life, anyway. In Hollywood, beauty never has to fade!”


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