Betty White To Star In ‘Golden Girls’ Reboot on CBS


MIAMI, Florida –

Everyone’s favorite TV queen, Betty White, has reportedly signed on to star in a reboot of the classic 80s sitcom The Golden Girls, which ran for 7 seasons and also originally starred Bea Arthur, Estelle Getty, and Rue McClanahan.

“I am so extremely excited to go back to work on what I think was my crowning achievement as an actress,” said White. “I only wish that the other girls could be here to take part. They tell me that the scripts are coming along, and that they’re going to be so dark and gritty. It’s going to be a fun change!”

The reboot is still being cast, but will reportedly will take place in the same home in Miami, with White reprising her role as Rose.

“Rose was one of the most loveable characters on TV, and Golden is one of of, if not the best, written sitcoms in television history,” said CBS executive Merle Rogers. “We are extremely excited to work with Betty again, and to begin a whole new series of ‘being a friend.'”

No air date or shoot schedule has been set for the series, but Rogers did say that it’s not “entirely out of the question” to make the show grittier and more updated.

“People like their shows dark now. Back in the day, we had, for example, the comedic Batman TV series. Now we have The Dark Knight. It’s the same with TV,” said Rogers. “It’s all Walking Dead, Breaking Bad, Mad Men. Moody, dark shows. That’s what people want, so that’s what we’ll give them with this Golden Girls reboot.”

New Series of ‘Kids Say the Darndest Things’ to Portray Children Accusing Bill Cosby of Rape

New Series of 'Kids Say the Darndest Things' to Portray Children Accusing Bill Cosby of Rape

MIAMI, Florida –

CBS has announced that it is bringing back the popular 90s series, Kids Say the Darndest Things, which will portray children accusing host Bill Cosby of rape. The network explained that the charges of sexual assault which have brought Cosby back into the limelight, have increased demand of a return to the nostalgic favorite.

“During the three seasons of Kids, we got to hear the craziest and cutest things being said,” CBS executive Kevin Heller stated at a press conference. “I still laugh at that iconic line, ‘Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it.’ And I think it will be rivalled by an eight year old girl who says in the new season, ‘You hurt me when you did that thing to my privates.’”

Not everyone has received the news positively. Critics from have called the development nothing more than a publicity stunt.

“Yes, we all want to see Kids Say the Darndest Things return to our screens,” one wrote. “But the circumstances under which it’s been developed. Bill has found fame again with those rape charges, and now he wants to advance it by bringing children into the picture too. It’s shameless, the way a former great is now desperate for ratings.”

The director for the new season, Steven Howard, dismissed those claims, saying that the show will “speak for itself”.

“It’s set to be the series of the year. There are just such great conversations that have been recorded so far. Here’s a sneak preview, quoted verbatim from the first episode.”


Cosby: Hi Greta. How old are you?

Greta: I was five when you stole my virginity.

Cosby: Hehehe, that’s so darn cute. And what is your favorite thing in the world?

Greta: There is no joy in my life any more.

Cosby: And why would you say that, young girl?

Greta: It’s because you raped me, tainting my childhood and ruining my future sex life.

Cosby: Hehehe, this five year old girl says the darndest things!

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