CUENCA, Ecuador –
Marlon Domingo, 16, did not think twice before risking his life to save a sloth that was trapped in the middle of the road. Drivers were going around the sloth, but Domingo knew it was only a matter of time before one was not paying attention.
The sloth seems to have started his journey across the road in the morning before traffic hit. Domingo encountered him in the middle of the morning rush and immediately dashed into traffic to save him. Because of an accident caused by Domingo, police came and blocked off the road, while the sloth was slowly edged to the other side of the road.
While the sloth is fine, a Brazilian couple was injured when they crashed their car into a guard rail. Even though the driver received treatment for whiplash and the passenger left with a broken nose, they say they are just happy the sloth is okay. “I got some cute pictures for Facebook with the sloth once my nose stopped bleeding, so it was all worth it,” commented Mrs. Velasco.
WASHINGTON, D.C. –
A slew of emails between anonymous officials has revealed a shocking truth about E-Z Pass, the electronic toll payment system used by millions of Americans every day. According to the documents, the E-Z Pass system was secretly set up by the U.S. Government to help track and monitor individuals as they travel.
“The system has been in place for over 25 years, and it has helped us to watch over everyone,” said one of the e-mails. “We believe that a spread of E-Z Pass throughout the entire country would help to further our needs of collecting and storing data.”
“It’s crazy! I already have my aluminum hat on, I’ve taped over the mic and camera on my laptop, and I even cancelled my internet so the government didn’t know what kind of porn I was jerking it to…and now I can’t even drive anywhere?! It’s crazy!” said E-Z Pass user Mike Pooler. “The government is on to us! They’re on to us, and they’re coming for our women, our children, and especially our guns!”
Supposedly set up just to make traffic flow easier by tying a small box, read by a machine at every toll both, to your checking account or bank card, E-Z Pass users have said that, as of late, they have felt “less safe” using the device. It isn’t just the government that may be tracking your location, though. According to some users, E-Z Pass may also be selling your travel data to advertising companies.
“I used to drive everywhere, and just throw some quarters in a slot, and all was right with the world,” said Joe Goldsmith, a former E-Z Pass user. “When E-Z Pass came out, it was great – you barely even need to slow down. I noticed more recently, though, that whenever I travelled, I’d come home and I’d have emails about places I’d visited. Or I would get unsolicited mail about new hotels in areas I had just been. It scared the hell out of me. I threw my E-Z Pass away.”