Mall Santa Arrested For Possession of Child Pornography

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PHOENIX, Arizona – Mall Santa Arrested For Possession of Child Pornography

A mall Santa in Phoenix was taken into custody late last evening, after it was reported by several security guards that the man may be taking nude photographs of children visiting him.

The Santa, who told police that his real name was Chris Kringle, was allegedly in possession of dozens of naked photos of children, both boys and girls, all who were wearing elf hats and shoes.

“This self-proclaimed Santa is a dirty, disturbing pervert,” said Cpt. Scott Calvin of the Phoenix Police Department. “We received reports that he was storing photographs of naked children inside his little pretend house that the mall had set up for him just outside the food court. When we arrested Kringle, we did discover Polaroid photos of what appear to be very young children, between the ages of 6 and 11. Kringle is being charged with felony possession of pornography and endangering the welfare of a child.”

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According to police reports, Kringle is claiming that he is entirely innocent, and that it’s all a big misunderstanding.

“Those are not pictures of children,” said Kringle during police questioning. “Those are elves. Yes, I know they look like children, but elves like to blend in with people, so that’s how they appear. But I promise you, the pictures are of people who are hundreds, some even thousands, of years old. I know I have a problem, but it’s not with looking at naked children. That’s disgusting. I love children. The only problem I have is that I’ve betrayed my wife, Mrs. Kringle-Claus. I owe her a massive apology, and I hope she will forgive me.”

Police are currently trying to identify the children in the photos, but so far have come up short. A lawyer for Kringle said that he is ‘working tirelessly’ to get the charges dropped before December 24th, when he says that Kringle will need to be out delivering presents to all the good boys and girls of the world.

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