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Rehabilitation Center Trains Penguins to Eat With Chopsticks to Enjoy Meals

March 27, 2015

SAN DIEGO, California -  Rehabilitators, biologists, and animal lovers in California are working through an animal rehabilitation center to bring back the joy of eating food to one of the planet’s most beloved species. It’s been many ...

Headlines
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U.S. Regulators Looking To Drop Legal Drinking Age From 21 To 12

March 26, 2015

WASHINTON, D.C. -  United States regulators have recently announced their plans to drop the legal drinking age from 21 to 12, citing the minimum-age drinking laws of other many other countries around the world, some of which ...

Entertainment

Suge Knight Continues Faking Illnesses To Gain Sympathy, Get Jail Time Lowered

March 26, 2015

LOS ANGELES, California -  After Suge Knight collapsed in court on Tuesday, reports suggest that the rapper is to continue faking illness until he either receives a light sentence or total reprieve. Knight is on trial ...

Headlines

FCC Announces Closure; ‘People Don’t Need To Be Parented Anymore’

March 26, 2015

WASHINGTON, D.C. -  The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) today shocked the American public by announcing its official closure. The reason, the regulatory agency said, is that they feel people no longer need to be “parented”. By ...

Sports

Football Fan Certain That Referee Biased Against His Team

March 26, 2015

DENVER, Colorado - Emerging live from our coverage of the game today, a football fan is certain that the referee is biased against the team he supports. He is sure that the current call, which just ...

Entertainment

New MTV Show to Follow Future Teenage Drug Addicts

March 26, 2015

LOS ANGELES, California -  MTV have announced that they are in production of a groundbreaking new reality series, which will follow the early lives of future teen drug addicts. According to their statement, the show will ...

Government

After Years As #1 Write-In Candidate, Mickey Mouse Announces Official Presidential Run

March 26, 2015

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Long touted as a possible presidential candidate, Mickey Mouse has finally announced that he’ll be running for the post in the 2016 elections. He is the second to officially make known his intentions ...

Headlines

Netanyahu Secures Election Victory, Ready To Resume Guessing What U.S. Wants

March 25, 2015

JERUSALEM, Israel -  Benjamin Netanyahu has been strongly criticised regarding statements he made immediately prior to the Israeli elections last week. He expressed definitively that the touted Two State Solution would not occur “on [his] watch”. ...

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