Family Drowns After Leaving Sunroof Open In Automated Carwash


DARWIN, Mississippi – 

A family of three died yesterday after inadvertently leaving their sunroof open when going through an automated carwash. Mary and Roger Jones, both 32, and their daughter, Julie, 11, were all killed after the car filled with water.

“It’s a tragic, horrible thing,” said carwash owner Joe Goldsmith. “Thing is, we have signs everywhere reminding people to close their windows. The water comes fast and furious, and it’s dangerous to have windows open. This is the first time in my 40 years as a carwash owner that something like this has happened, though.”

According to police, Roger Jones, who was driving, left the sunroof of their vehicle open as they entered the automated carwash. Security footage shows that a few seconds after they enter, the sunroof does begin to close, but the water reportedly shorted out the motor.

“The car was filled with over 200 gallons of soapy, sudsy, 300-degree water,” said police chief Miles Smith. “It’s a real tragedy, but a real cautionary tale as well. Always make sure you close your windows.”

Teen Drowns While Stuck Inside Condom After Performing Internet Challenge


LAS VEGAS, Nevada –

A 17-year-old teen was reportedly killed performing yet another stupid internet stunt, this one involving condoms filled with water. The “condom challenge,” designed, apparently, to prove that no guy is actually “too big” to wear a condom, involved filling a condom with an excessive amount of water, and then dropping it onto a participant’s head.

“Jessica Moore and her friend, Theresa Jones, were reportedly filming themselves performing the ‘condom challenge,’ and Jessica was killed in the processes, drowning when the condom filled with liquid got stuck around her head,” said police chief Larry Whittum. “This is a stupid and dangerous challenge that has no real merit. Everyone knows that condoms can fit any size penis, and filling a rubber with water and dropping it on someone’s head is not going to bring awareness to anything.”

Police caution that the Condom Challenge can lead to serious injury or, as is the case with poor Jessica Moore, death.

“We strongly advise teens to not perform this challenge, and to certainly not record it and post it online,” said Whittum. “You’re just going to continue to breed other stupid challenges performed by other stupid people like yourselves.”

A sample video of the Condom Challenge. Luckily, this girl survived with only a soaked shirt. Not all will be so lucky. Video contains coarse language.

‘Price Is Right’ Superfan Drowns In Hot Tub He Received As Prize

VENTURA, California – ‘Price Is Right’ Superfan Drowns In Hot Tub He Received As Prize

Ted Bosworth was a dedicated husband, father, and self-described ‘ultimate superfan’ of The Price Is Right, the iconic daytime game show known for its legion of enthusiastic fans.

Bosworth attended so many tapings of the show, that audience coordinators knew him by name.  He was at Bob Barker’s final show in 2007, and just last year, the ultimate superfan’s dream came true – he was selected to “come on down!” and become one of 4 lucky audience members to join ‘Contestant’s Row.’

Bosworth had dreamed of this moment for years.  “He loved the show ever since we were kids,” said Bosworth’s younger brother, Al.  “It’s like he was always preparing for it.  Life’s just not fair sometimes,” said Al, “I mean what happened to him.  Life’s just not fair.”

Ted bid on the first prize of the day, a state-of-the-art hot tub, and was indeed, the contestant who came closest to the ‘actual retail price without going over.’  “That was no surprise,” said Al.  “We watched the show so many times, he always came closest when we watched at home. He bid, and he won.”

“After he won,” continued Al, “it was like watching a kid waiting for Christmas.  It took a few weeks for the tub to be delivered, so he got the space all ready in the backyard, fixing it up and getting the plumbing done.  When they came to install it, we almost had to tie him down.  Deb [Ted’s wife] told me he didn’t sleep the whole night before.”

“We were planning a big party for the ‘Christening.’  That’s what we called it – people were coming over for the first hot tub party that night,” said Al.  We were all out getting food and drinks and Ted stayed home testing it out, and that’s when the accident happened.”

The “accident” Al refers to was an all-too-common household mishap – slipping and falling in the tub.  “We got back home and I knew something was wrong.  The house was too quiet.  I went back out to the patio and that’s when I found him.  He must have slipped and hit his head and went under.  We called 911, but I knew it was too late even when I was pulling him out of the tub.”

Paramedics were unable to revive Bosworth and he was pronounced dead at the scene.

“We drained the tub and took it out the next week.  It was too painful to keep it around but we planted a tree out back to remember.”

“I couldn’t watch the show anymore for about 6 months, but one day I thought about it and decided that Ted would want me to move on and watch it again, since we both had so much fun enjoying it over the years. It’s like he’s here when the show’s on,” he added.

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