‘Clock Kid’ Mad 15 Minutes of Fame Is Over, Says He’s Thinking Of New Scam To Get Back On TV

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DALLAS, Texas – 

Ahmed Mohammed, the kid who built a hoax bomb and brought it to school and became an international celebrity after he was arrested, gave an interview with a local Dallas news station saying he was “extremely upset” that people had forgotten about him already, and that he didn’t expect that his “15 minutes of fame” would be over so quickly.

“I built that fake bomb – er, I mean, I built that clock and brought it to school, and the whole world went nuts,” said Mohammed, standing next to his father, Mohammed Mohammed. “Now it would seem that people have forgotten about me, and it’s only been a few weeks. My family and I, we can’t not be in the spotlight, so we are coming up with a new scam, er, I mean, a new plan, to have people talking about us again.”

Mohammed was arrested after he brought a hoax bomb to school. Many people were upset because he was arrested, although those people generally didn’t read past headlines, and never knew that Mohammed’s arrest actually came about because the “clock” was clearly a hoax bomb, which is a crime to carry. Mohammed himself even admitted in interviews that he knew the device “looked sketchy.”

“The clock thing got me some cool gear, and some cool trips, and I even got to meet terrorist leader!” said Mohammed. “Now, though, my family’s spotlight is fading, so we’re figuring out a way to get back on people’s radar. Our first step is to sue the school and town for $15 million dollars.”

Mohammed Mohammed, Ahmed’s father, agreed that something “would have to be done” to keep his family from fading into obscurity like they so rightly deserve to do.

‘Clock Kid’ Becomes Biggest Selling Halloween Costume Of All Time

clock kid

DALLAS, Texas – 

The ‘clock kid’ look has just become the most sought-after and biggest selling Halloween costume of all time, selling 29.7 million times on Amazon in the last 48 hours, according to reports.

“We can’t believe how many costumes we sold,” said costume designer Jim Meyer of Costume Company, Inc. “It’s staggering. I’m not sure how we will even make all the suitcase bombs…er, I mean ‘clocks,’ in time for the holiday.”

Clock Kid, which is based on a recent major headline involving a scam artist teen who built a hoax bomb and brought it to school, was originally slated to be banned by most online retailers, after a couple people started a petition, calling it “racist.” More proof that money talks, though, when it comes to major companies, the rapid sales changed the minds of Amazon, and others.

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“Oh, we definitely want it to be available, no matter how racist it is, or isn’t, depending on how you look at it,” said Amazon spokesman Rett Tyler. “I mean, I’m not offended by it, so I couldn’t possibly care less. We’ve sold approximately a half a billion dollars worth of this costume in the last couple days. There are going to be a ton of Clock Kids coming to your door for candy this Halloween.”

According to HalloweenWatch.edu, ‘Clock Kid’ may hold the world record for biggest-selling costume of all time. It has reportedly already passed ghost, witch, and cowboy in children’s costumes, as well as sexy nurse, sexy maid, and sexy schoolgirl in the adult costume world.

“If this stays huge into next Halloween, we’ll also be releasing a ‘sexy clock kid’ version of the costume as well,” said Meyer. “This is a damn goldmine.”

There is no word from Clock Kid himself, Ahmed Mohammed, on how he feels about the costume, although more than likely, he and his family are just upset that they are entitled to any royalties.

White Christian Teen Arrested For Wearing Shoes With Picture Of Clock To School

clock shoe

FRYEBURG, Maine – 

A 13-year-old white student was arrested at a school in Fryeburg, Maine this morning for allegedly wearing shoes that had a picture of a clock on them. Police say that white kid Jacob Smith painted the shoes himself, and has a keen interest in clocks and art, and thought other kids would think they were “cool.”

“Jacob Smith was arrested after wearing inappropriate footwear to class,” said Fryeburg police chief Aaron Silver. “The school has a zero-tolerance policy for items that are, or appear to be, any sort of timepiece, as it is possible that it could be an explosive.”

The school board says that Smith, who is in the ninth grade at Fryeburg High School, is a straight-A student, and enjoys art, English, and hitting on girls during gym class.

“He’s a typical white kid who happens to be a tad bit smarter than the other kids in his class,” said teacher Jeanne Curtis. “Obviously the kid has a knack for footwear, but I’m sorry – clocks, whether they are drawn, bought, built, or whatever, have no place in my classroom. It was only right that I call the police.”

A 14-year-old student in Texas was arrested recently after bringing a clock to school that he had “built,” although authorities knew right off it wasn’t a bomb, and was a just a hoax device. In that case, it was obvious to police and investigators that the family designed the entire event to spur racist arguments in the media and to gain attention for the family, who are known media hounds. Sadly, the news outlets nationwide weren’t bright enough to figure out the sad, lame attempt, and fed right into it.

“This situation is different than that Muslim kid in Texas,” said Silver. “This is a white kid in Maine. The fact that he’s white, though, shouldn’t matter, because he should know better. Maybe he thought because he was white he could get away with it, I don’t know. Either way, h was arrested and charged with reckless artistic abandon and criminal threatening. Thank God he’s a Christian. Maybe he can pray his way out of trouble.”

According to Silver, if convicted, Jacob Smith could face up to 24 hours in the jail.

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