Facebook To Make All Private Messages Viewable By Public – The Reason Why Will Shock You!

MENLO PARK, California – Facebook To Make All Private Messages Viewable By Public - The Reason Why Will Shock You!

Facebook has shocked the world today with their announcement that they will be publicizing all users’ past and current direct messages, in a move that they say will help to “promote honesty.”

Earlier today, CEO of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, announced the policy changes in a status update via his personal, confirmed account. The status has since been deleted, however, it was shared thousands of times, and a screenshot of the original post has surfaced.

The original post read:

“I have been getting a lot of questions about our new direct message policy, which will make messages viewable by the public. It is a policy that we are going to enact over the next couple of updates. We feel it is a good policy that will promote honesty, and it will be retroactive, so old messages will be visible until a week after you deactivate your Facebook account.”

An anonymous source at Facebook was able to confirm that, despite the post being taken down, Facebook is definitely including the ‘public messages’ feature into future updates. The source was also able to confirm the feature will publicize all messages sent over the life of the Facebook account.

“Mark [Zuckerberg] has lost his head. He’s in bed with the NSA, he reads people’s personal messages for entertainment value. He views himself as some benevolent enforcer of morality. Facebook started as a way to connect with people, but now he is on another level,” said the anonymous employee. “The bad thing is, he slipped it into the terms of use years ago – anything you upload onto Facebook servers, including messages, is the property of Facebook, and can be made public. So if you’re using messenger to cheat on your spouse, or to sell or buy drugs, or anything you thought would stay private, you need to prepare yourself for everyone you know being able to read those messages, and probably sooner than you think.”

The new policy has been ill-received on social media. Screenshots of the post along, with angry comments, are spreading across the internet. Facebook users on the whole say they are not okay with the company playing with their private information.

“Facebook sucks, and it has for a while,” said user Mark Jacobs. “I guess with a change like this, it’s time we all move back to MySpace. They not only didn’t have privacy concerns, they let you order your friends into a top 8! God, remember that? Those were the days.”

screenshot
A screenshot of the original post shows over 8k shares and 78k ‘likes’

Facebook Urges Users To ‘Quit Bitching’ About Privacy Policies

SILICON VALLEY, California – Facebook Urges Users To 'Quit Their Bitching' About Privacy Policies

A disgruntled mediator of the Facebook Products & Services page finally cracked this morning, posting a status that was what he claimed everyone at the company has been thinking; “Stop bitching about our privacy settings. It’s not like you even pay for this service.”

“We slave over these new apps, services, and features to make staying in touch with friends and family easier and more enjoyable. We even give the individuals a chance to decide to what degree they would like to be Facebook-stalked. So, we collect some data. So what?” said the post, made earlier today.

Of the 167 million people who have liked the product service page, many immediately replied that they hated being required to get Facebook Messenger on their phones, stating the terms and conditions did not respect their privacy.

“Oh, you want more privacy? Didn’t think that was your first concern, seeing as how you blast your friends’ feeds with a play-by-play of a fight with your boyfriend, of the food you’re having for dinner, and the consistency of the shit you took this morning. This whole entire website is based on voyeurism. You post every one of your stupid thoughts and inane opinions, but you’re worried about what we’re doing with your information. Really?

One use replied “STOP GIVING OUR INFORMATION TO THE GOVERNMENT,” to which the unnamed Facebook employee commented, “Oh, shut the fuck up with your conspiracies – Do you think the feds really care to track your weed runs, anyway, loser? Are you that important? If you’re carrying a cell phone, the government can track you on their own without our help, anyway.”

Until it was taken down, the initial post got a hundreds of ‘Lmfao’ comments, as well as several people saying they would delete their accounts and move to other social media websites. Most of those had responses from other users asking ‘where in the hell’ they would go, as they correctly pointed out that Facebook is the only social media website that people care about. The post itself had just over 97,000 ‘likes.’

In an email announcement, Facebook representative Erin Slate said, “Facebook has terminated the posting employee from his position, and have also deactivated his person account. We recently sent out a notification to users to let everyone know we care about privacy concerns. Obviously, this one individual does not speak for the company as a whole, even if we did give him full access to our page, passwords, and servers. We appreciate positive user feedback, and always strive to improve satisfaction. All the changes we make are to make our users even happier. Please see our data policy for more details.”

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