First Lady Michelle Obama Reveals Her Secret Black Metal Music Fetish

black metal


First lady Michelle Obama would be the last person you would think of when it comes to famous celebrities who listen to heavy metal or any sort of rock music, but as it turns out, the first lady is a huge fan of extremely vile, heavy, and extreme metal and grindcore bands.

“Oh my God, yes, I love it,” said Obama when she was questioned about a recent image of her showing off some of her CD collection. “I grew up on gospel songs and pop music, and when I marred Barack, he turned me on to some of the heavier stuff, and I was hooked. Then I started branching out on my own. I love this heavy stuff so much!”

According to Obama, she listens to death metal and grindcore while she works out.

“Nothing gets the blood pumping more than some Vulvectomy or some Anal Cunt,” said Obama, proudly displaying her Post Abortion Slut Fuck album. “When you want to relax, there are plenty of great bands. But when you want to really tear some shit up, there’s nothing quite like some heavy, dark, and pulsing metal.”

For Christmas, the first lady said she received new albums by Rotting Flesh Corpse, Dismembered Fetal Fucks, and Solid Core Enema.

“Barack knows me so well,” quipped The First Lady.

Study Shows That Listening To Heavy Metal While Pregnant Increases Baby’s Hair Growth

Study Shows That Listening To Heavy Metal While Pregnant Increases Baby's Hair Growth


STANFORD, California –

A group of prominent geneticists and musicologists from Stanford University recently released the results of a research project entitiled Prenatal Music Exposure. Scientists checked how different music genres affect the pregnancy, and what is their influence on baby’s growth after birth. Some of the results were shocking.

A small group of the researchers focused specifically on rock and metal music, wherein they asked 100 women to exclusively listen to nothing but Pantera, Iron Maiden, Judas Priest and Black Sabbath for the entire 9 months of pregnancy. Each day they were required to spend at least 2 hours exposed to the music. Scientists monitored the babies from their time in utero until the time they were 5-years-old, in order to see how the children would grow based on music.

“There were some experiments done in the past that proved music affects brain’s development, but nobody ever noticed such an obvious, physical evidence,” says Dr. Karen Ash from Stanford University. “We noted increased hair growth among children whose mothers listened to heavy metal during pregnancy. Compering to children who were exposed to other genres, the Metal Kids, as we called them, grew their head hair twice as fast. While an average hair of a non-metal child grew approximately one quarter inch monthly, a metal kid’s hair became up to half an inch longer. Several of the children, who are now 5, have hair past their knees.”

Scientists assume it is an example of genetic adaptation. The children grew long hair so they could effectively headbang to the rhythm of heavy metal.

“My daughter has long, black hair and she constantly refuses to have it tied. When she hears metal, she immediately starts moving her head rhythmically, back and forward, just like those guys during concerts,” says Mary Curtis, one of the mothers who participated in the experiment. “It’s kind of cute, but to be honest, I’ve been listening to nothing but heavy metal for almost 6 years now. She won’t let me listen to anything else. It’s really getting to be tiring.”

Scientists are not sure whether all genres can influence the human body in such apparent ways, or if it is restricted to just metal. They are also checking punk music, classical, rap, and opera. The rap babies are the only ones showing any signs of real change in any sort of physical behavior, as they all constantly pull their diaper down below their waste, letting the diaper hang low. Researchers are not sure if this was caused by the music, or just happenstance.


Jay-Z Collaborates With Avenged Sevenfold Guitarist, Ex-Slipknot Drummer On New Metal Project

NEW YORK CITY, New York – empire-news-jay-z-collaborates-with-synster-gates-jordinson-new-metal-album

He has sold over 75 million records, won 17 Grammy Awards, he is a certified agent in Major League Baseball and the National Football League, operates Roc Nation Music Group, owns a clothing line and is married to the one and only Beyonce. His net-worth is believed to be somewhere in the $500 million dollar range. So what exactly can Jay-Z do that he has never done? Whatever he wants.

Sunday afternoon in a brief press release by his newly acquired publicist, Shannon Pryor, it was announced that Jay-Z has been collaborating with rockers such as guitarist Synyster Gates (Avenged Sevenfold) and drummer Joey Jordison (ex-Slipknot, Scar The Martyr, Murderdolls) and the trio will release an album in early 2015.

During Friday’s briefing in Manhattan, Pryor announced that Jay-Z was extremely excited about the project and described the upcoming album by saying “Extreme metal with an aggressive flow”. The album, not yet titled, will also feature various rockers such as Deftones vocalist Chino Moreno, Tool vocalist Maynard James Keenan, and…wait for it… the one and only Ozzy Osbourne. The album will be produced by iconic music producer Rick Rubin who has worked with Jay-Z in the past on several occasions, while also producing ground-breaking efforts by the Beastie Boys, Slayer, Johnny Cash, Slipknot, Eminem, and even Adele.

“Rap and metal have been done, meshed into super-sonic artistry of mixed hardcore musical cultures,  but never quite like this.” Pryor said. “Just because he is one of the greatest rappers of all time does not necessarily mean he will be rapping on the album. We believe that fans will be pleasantly shocked upon the albums release, until then, material previously written and recorded, will be tightly kept under wraps. It is an exciting venture and Jay-Z and Roc Nation cannot wait for the albums groundbreaking release in early 2015.”

Fans have taken to the internet by storm, Tweeting and posting about this intriguing mashup. A game changing hip-hop artist working with heavy metal icons on a not-necessarily-generic-rap-metal effort. One thing we do know, is when Jay-Z does something, he does it big. Love him or hate him, the man has power and major influence in today’s modern American and International music culture. Even if the people do not love the music and strange new vocal approach by Jay-Z, one thing is certain, and that is the project will sell, and it will sell big. Seemingly a win/win situation for all involved.

So far, everyone involved has been tight-lipped on a release date, but inside sources are saying the album could be released as soon as October.

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