NFL To Take After NHL Hockey, Starting Use of ‘Penalty Box’ In 2015

Posted on October 21, 2014 by skullman

NEW YORK, New York –

In a bizarre move in sports today, the NFL announced that starting in the 2015 season, the sport will incorporate a ‘penalty box’ for players who are flagged for fighting or other infractions during gameplay. NFL commissioner Roger Goodell announced the change to a group of players, coaches, and sports writers in a closed conference Tuesday morning.

“As all fans of the NFL and football in general know, we are the laughingstock of the sports world. For years we have tried to portray ourselves as hardcore athletes, the best of the best, all the while knowing that our players generally don’t have to run for more than 20 feet at a time, and that plays usually don’t last for more than 45 seconds before action is stopped, and the players stand around doing nothing.” Goodell said, with signs of tears forming. “Our boys play anywhere from 17 to 19 times a year, and that’s it. We need to toughen them up. So it is with this in mind, that we have instituted some changes to our calendars, and to our policies.”

Goodell went on to explain that fighting would now be just a short, 5-minute stint in the penalty box, and it would be encouraged by coaches during gameplay.

“We know that the NHL leads the way in real tough-guy sports. They fight, they punch, they’ve even stabbed each other with their skates – and all they get is a couple of minutes in a box. A box where they can gloat and cheer and get the fans behind them. That’s what we need in the NFL. Understandably, this is a big change from our current standing on the matter, where a player who fights on the field could be fined hundreds of thousands of dollars and possibly even released from their team and their contract. But damnit, this is the NFL, and we’re supposed to be MEN here!” Goodall bellowed to those in attendance.

He continued by saying that all stadiums were going to be required to build boxes on either side of the field, in a 7′x7′ area. The box is to be encased in plexiglass, and players should definitely punch, headbutt, and bang on it as often as possible when sent to the box during a game.

Players commented after the conference, stating that it was a great idea and a nice change to the game.

“It’s about time this sport toughened up a bit. This is definitely going to make this game more of the bloodsport that it always portrayed itself as, but could never really be because of stupid rules,” said a player for the Denver Broncos who wished to remain anonymous. “I can’t wait to get out there and crack some f—— heads.”

The new changes also included a more expanded season calendar, which has teams playing from the beginning of August and end in March, with each team playing at least 5 times a week, for a total of 150 games per team, not including post-season games.

During the questioning period after the announcement, Goodell was asked about the possibility of these new rule and schedule changes increasing the already terrifying statistics of brain injury and concussions associated with professional football.

“Yeah, probably,” he said. “But damn if it won’t be a better game to watch now, huh?”

REPORT: NFL Players Make Too Much Money; Risk $10k Fines To Wear Sub-Par Headphones

Posted on October 13, 2014 by Bob The Empire News Potato

CHARLOTTE, North Carolina –

Just last week, San Francisco 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick was fined $10,000 by the NFL for wearing a pair of Beats brand headphones during a press conference after the team’s win over the Chiefs. The fine was the first of its kind after a ban was placed on the product; the NFL has a deal with BOSE systems, and for the most part, players are required to either wear that brand of headphones, or none at all.

Yesterday, Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton was also photographed wearing Beats by Dre headphones, apparently not giving one second thought to the fact that he, too, could end up fined the equivalent of what amounts to half of the annual salary of many of his fans.

“I think these players, they make too much money,” said Al Ross, a lifelong football fan in Boston. “I mean, first of all, they’re out there, spending hundreds of dollars on these stupid, shitty name-brand headphones, and then the NFL says ‘Sorry, you can’t wear those,’ and instead of replacing the aforementioned pieces of shit with the free Bose headphones the club would give them, they risk having to fork over $10,000 because they want to keep wearing them? I love football, but the players are dumb as a bunch of bricks, I tell ya.”

“Personally, I’m a huge fan of sub-par headphones that break every few months, that’s why I keep wearing them,” said Bo Roberts, second-string linebacker for the Chicago Bears. “They wanted to give me the new brand that the NFL deals with, but that’s dumb. My Beats work fine for the most part, if I jiggle the wire just right and tilt my head to one side. There’s no reason to get rid of them just yet – not because the offices tell us to, anyway. That’s stupid.”

The NFL has yet to comment on whether Cam Newton would also be fined for wearing his Beats headphones. In other related news, Skullcandy is literally begging any player that they can find, in any professional0 sport, to possibly wear their headphones in public, to remind people that they, too, want to be thought of us ‘cool.’

Johnny Manziel Looks Ahead To Career As Sports Broadcaster

Posted on October 7, 2014 by Ross Crain

CLEVELAND, Ohio –

Following in the steps of former college greats like Tim Tebow, Johnny Manziel is working tirelessly to perfect his diction and stockpile quirky synonyms for dynamic touchdowns. During a recent press conference, Manziel talked about his future within the sport, looking ahead at a future in broadcasting.

“The reality is I’m lucky to be here. There are really, really talented and strong guys out there, and obviously I’m just not one of them. I can say some funny stuff, and make that ‘money’ sign with my hands, though. So I got that going for me,” said Manziel. “I have no allusions at all. I know I am built like an athletic Frodo Baggins. Now that’s great for Hobbits in a hairy foot race, but absolutely useless in the NFL. Thankfully, I got some pretty cool one-liners and catch phrases. Take ‘Johnny Football’ for example. I made that up myself. I can do nicknames for everybody someday.”

The charismatic college star couldn’t contain himself, and wouldn’t even stop to answer questions being poised by the reporters in the room. “I’m totally going to act like I can actually play in this league for now, though. Hell, I might even get lucky and ‘Tebow’ a few games. You know, when you win a few and everyone is like, ’What? How did that happen? That guy is a total fluke!’ That’s what a ‘Tebow’ is,” explain Manziel.

When asked about Manziel’s comments, Tim Tebow, a current free agent who has played for the New York Jets and the Denver Broncos, confirmed Manziel’s claim. “Yeah I got really, really lucky and everyone knows it. I mean, neither of us have any reason to be near a football game at all unless we are in TV studio commenting on athletes that are doing things that we will just never be able to do, or watching at home with some chips and a beer.”

NFL Announces New Schedule; Games To Be Added Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday Nights

Posted on September 16, 2014 by JP

MANHATTAN, New York –

With football season back in full effect, the question ever American is asking is ‘Are You Ready For Some Football!?’ Tickets sales for the NFL have hit record highs this year, as well as record subscriptions being recorded for TVs The NFL Network.

The NFL has been around for decades, but over the past few years fans have been given more and more options to watch highlights, full games, and find stats. CEO of the NFL, Roger Goodell, claims that fans are eating it up, and that ratings have sky rocketed.

“Back when the NFL started, people just watched one game on television if they were lucky. Now, we have the technology to broadcast every game and even have multiple games played on one day,” said Goodell. “Even our NFL shows that just review match-ups, predictions, and highlights of the games have been bringing in huge numbers, so we have decided to give fans exactly what they want.”

With new contracts starting in the 2015 NFL football season, Goodell and his board of directors for NFL programming have increased the number of days that games will be played. Currently, games are played and broadcast on Sunday, Monday, and Thursday evenings. Starting in 2015, the NFL plans to also add Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday games.

“At first we couldn’t believe the feedback we got for Monday night football, so we did Thursday night football. When we saw those numbers we thought ‘Wow! people really like watching football,'” said Goodell. “It’s with that in mind that we’ve decided to add more days, and more games. We want to give these rabid NFL fans exactly what they want.”

With this recent announcement, contracts and team schedules are still in the air. It is unclear how many games will be played next season for each team, but at least two NFL teams will now being playing daily.

Other network TV stations say they are worried that they may lose a large amount of evening viewers if the NFL has games every night.

“We already have some pretty weak programming on during the evening, especially during the weekends,” said CBS program director Bill Waters. “If the NFL is going to broadcast a game every night, we’re honestly considering just going dark during the games. What’s the point of airing something that no one will watch?”

At this point in time, Goodell says they have no intention of expanding the season for the NFL, but he says if the 7-day games option does as well as they expect, the 2016 season could see an extension to include the rest of the year.

Kellogg’s To Change Name Of Rice Krispies In Lieu Of Ray Rice Controversy

Posted on September 12, 2014 by Raoul Stockton

BATTLE CREEK, Michigan –

It seems that everyone is talking about football player Ray Rice’s scandal after video footage of the NFL football star knocking out his then fiancée was released to the public last week. Today the Kellogg’s brand, who makes the cereal Rice Krispies (the iconic cereal released in 1928) and Rice Krispies Treats (released in 1995) announced that the topic has become so talked about in the media, that it has affected the sales of the cereal. The company has ultimately decided that drop the word “Rice” from their name.

Kellogg’s spokesperson Lesley Davidson told the Associated Press this morning that due to the drastic decline in sales they will be changing the name of the cereal to Kracklin’ Krispies, the treats will be named Kracklin’ Krispies Treats.

“Marketing is a funny thing. We know that it seems a bit ridiculous that the Ray Rice story would affect a brand of cereal, but it has. People relate words to either negative or positive images in the back of their subconscious minds,” said Davidson. “Think of how Kentucky Fried Chicken became KFC when the word “fried” starting having all sorts of negative connotations in a health-concious market. This is very similar. Sales in the past week have shown a dramatic drop-off in purchases of Rice Krispies and Rice Krispies Treats because of the Ray Rice Scandal. Marketing experts have it down to a science and it has been proven that certain words and names of products will trigger an impulse to buy or not to buy a product. An immediate change was deemed necessary, so our board of trustees voted on a name change.”

While serving what was a two-game suspension handed down by National Football League Commissioner Roger Goodell, Rice was released by the Baltimore Ravens on September 8, 2014 after the public release of video of the brutal assault on his then-fiancée, who is now his wife. The surveillance video from the elevator they were in shows Rice punching and knocking her out, then dragging her limp body out of the elevator. After the video was released, the NFL announced that Rice would suspended indefinitely. The Ravens then pulled all merchandise bearing his name off shelves, and his former high school, Rochelle High School in New York removed his jersey and pictures from various display cases throughout the school. Rutgers University, where he played college football, has since done the same.

When asked if the name change of the cereal was permanent, Davidson stated that it would remain effective for the foreseeable future. “We will cross that bridge when we get to it. If at some point the American public stops thinking of the word rice in a negative way, we may consider it, but for now a new marketing campaign for Kracklin‘ Krispies is being launched at full force,” he responded.

Ray Rice has been losing endorsement deals since the scandal hit. He was previously endorsed by the Otis elevator company, for whom he had appeared in live in person via presentation to large, and up and coming corporations and companies. Earlier this week he was dropped as their spokesperson. It has also been stated that legendary NFL and former San Francisco Forty-Niners great Jerry Rice is considering legally changing his name to just “Jerry.”

Other companies and products, including Uncle Ben’s White Rice and Rice-a-Roni, are also considering name changes to distance themselves from any controversy.

Cleveland Browns Rookie QB Johnny Manziel ‘Guarantees’ He Will Take Browns To Super Bowl

Posted on September 5, 2014 by Raoul Stockton

CLEVELAND, Ohio –

The outspoken, flamboyant, controversial Cleveland Browns rookie and second-string quarterback, Johnny Manziel, has guaranteed that he will take the Browns to the Super Bowl this season, something that has never been accomplished in franchise history, and that this feat will earn him the Most Valuable Player award.

When asked about head coach Mike Pettine’s decision to start veteran quarterback Brian Hoyer over him for their highly anticipated season opener against the Pittsburgh Steelers, Manziel told reporters on Friday that he will be the starting quarterback by week 3 and stunned the locker room with his comments.

“I guarantee I will take this team to the Super Bowl this season. To shut up all the haters I will take home the MVP award, bring the Lombardi Trophy to Cleveland, and take my happy ass and a few beautiful women to Disney World. Write that in your little article,” Manziel said in a state of frustration when Louisville Times reporter Quen Caudill asked him about the situation. Manziel had been fielding questions all week about Coach Pettine’s choice to start Hoyer this weekend, and apparently decided to throw the press a bone.

Manziel, aka “Johnny Football,” broke several NCAA division 1 FBS and SEC records last season at Texas A&M and was considered a leading candidate to win the Heisman Trophy as a Sophomore in the weeks before the 2013 season. Florida State freshman quarterback Jameis Winston would eventually be named the Heisman Trophy winner after leading his Seminoles’ to a National Championship.

Manziel’s eligibility for the 2013 season was under question after reports surfaced that he had signed autographs for money in January 2013. On August 28, 2013, the NCAA reached an agreement with Texas A&M to suspend Manziel for the first half of the team’s game against Rice. Many believe it cost him his chances to be a legitimate Heisman candidate while Louisville Cardinals QB Teddy Bridgewater moved up the board in popularity past him. Manziel anticipated being taken in the top 10 during the 2014 NFL draft and slid all the way down to the 22nd pick by the Browns.

When asked about Manziel’s comments, anticipated Browns starter Brian Hoyer seemed to take the high road and showed absolutely no animosity toward Manziel.

“This is the NFL. We are all very excited about getting out there and playing ball. Football is a very emotional game and when you work so hard to be named a starter and don’t quite make it, it is a tough deal. Johnny is awesome, he will be a great quarterback someday. I ain’t mad at the dude, he is a gamer, he wants to win and he wants to be a winner. I totally understand where he is coming from. He only expects the best and wants to be the one to bring it.”

Head coach Mike Pettine seemed to be a little frustrated with Johnny Football’s pre-mature comments, and wasn’t afraid of holding back in his comments.

“I tell ya what, he is a rookie, hell he is still an immature kid. That boy has a lot to learn I can tell ya that. I love the kid but he can be a loudmouth, I think you all know that already,” Pettine said, the entire press pool laughing. “He is frustrated, he just wants to get out there and play, that crap he said about the Super Bowl and winning MVP, I will talk to him about that. It won’t happen again I’ll tell ya that. Brian Hoyer earned the right to start this weekend and in my opinion, it’s no contest. Maybe Johnny just had to, you know, go to the bathroom, and his words were misunderstood.”

Donald Sterling Agrees To Sell Clippers, Plans To Buy Redskins

Posted on August 20, 2014 by mike the inkman

LOS ANGELES, California –

Donald Sterling, disgraced Los Angeles Clippers owner, has announced that he will agree to sell the team, bringing an end to the months-long legal battle between himself and the NBA. Sterling however, does not plan to go quietly into the night, and is in talks with Redskins owner Dan Snyder over a proposed deal to purchase the team, which has had its own issues with perceived racism as of late. Sterling spoke to ESPN Reporter Erin Andrews about his reasoning.

“Well, honey, it seems like my welcome in LA is worn out. They say I’m antiquated, a relic, and maybe I am. Sure, I’m a little over the hill, but I still enjoy the company of a lovely lady like yourself. I also enjoy the thrill of owning a sports franchise. Those beautiful black bodies exerting themselves to achieve a common goal. I imagine that’s how the South was built. I heard mumblings around the country club that Danny was getting fed up with this whole ‘racial slur’ garbage, and I thought to myself, ‘Now that’s a team I could own’. Of course if the deal goes through, I’ll have to clear up the nonsense with these bloodsuckers trying to soak up legal fees by forcing a great football franchise to change its identity. Mind you, I’ve got a few papers to sign yet, but we’ve already hammered out the particulars. As near as I can recall, Washington was built on the backs of the black man. Even now, they have that black quarterback. A real workhorse, that one. I’ll be damn proud to call him my own. As far as the name business goes, those damn Indians should be glad we let them hang around as we turned this wilderness into the great land that it is today, not to mention naming a premier sports franchise in their honor.”

Andrews, looking incredulous, asked Mr. Sterling what he thought of Roger Goodell, the league commissioner, making a public statement regarding his promise to fight tooth-and-nail to keep him from buying the team.

“That old Irishman? He’s not as tough as he makes himself out to be. I was a Jew in this country before being a Jew was an admirable thing. I know a thing or two about being told ‘no.’ Despite the anti-semites in the business world, I scratched and clawed my way to the top. If that ginger b—— thinks he can keep me from achieving my goals, he’s in for a real big surprise. He’s the one who’s got a problem with race, not me. You should have heard him on the phone the other day. He sounded like a red-haired Hitler. I don’t care if he is the Fuhrer of the NFL, his little legal team is no match for my legislative wehrmacht. I’ll get my team, and I’ll pay those Indians their price, and we’ll get this damn thing back on the right track.”

Roger Goodell could not be reached for comment, but a league spokesman was willing to address the possible Sterling buyout.

“The league feels that he’s a crazy old man that shouldn’t be involved in running anything. There are no plans at this time to let Mr. Sterling buy anything, but as he has said, people have tried to hold him back from his goals his entire life. I’d say that there is at least an outside chance that Donald Sterling could be the next owner of the Washington Redskins.

Michael Jackson Hologram Selected To Perform During Super Bowl XLIX Halftime Show

Posted on August 17, 2014 by Raoul Stockton

GLENDALE, Arizona –

After multiple conflicting reports suggesting that either Katy Perry or Carrie Underwood would be selected as the Super Bowl XLIX halftime performer, it came as quite a shock this morning as it was announced that the halftime performer is not a living person, but a hologram. The Arizona Super Bowl Host Committee decided to spice things up a bit and use the modern technology of today by selecting a holographic image of none other than the King of Pop, Michael Jackson. The hologram of Jackson will be the star of the show, which will take place on February 1st at University of Phoenix Stadium in Glendale, Arizona, home of the NFL’s Arizona Cardinals.

Holography is a modern-day technique that allows three-dimensional images to be projected by way of laser, interference, diffraction, light intensity, and virtual illumination. The final product is an image that seems to magically turn a picture into a living thing, in this case, Michael Jackson. Last May a hologram of Jackson was used at the 2014 Billboard Music Awards in Las Vegas, Nevada. The hologram and choreography took producers nearly a year of planning and technical work. The Super Bowl Host Committee conjured up the idea, and made it a priority to successfully follow through with, along with the assisting Billboard Music Award production team they plan (and guarantee) to do just that.

According to Arizona Super Bowl Host Committee chairman David Rousseau it was a cutting edge advancement in technology and entertainment that he believes needs to be embraced, offering NFL fans a halftime experience they would likely never forget.

“It was brought up in a meeting, seemingly as a joke by one of our staffers. In fact, it was such a ridiculous notion, that I ended up firing him for even mentioning it. Later that night, though, I went back and watched the Michael Jackson performance from the Billboard Music Awards, and I was amazed. It sent cold chills up my spine,” he said. “I even thought of calling up [the staffer] who suggested it and apologizing for laughing at his idea, but there really wasn’t time. The next morning we began to discuss it as if it were now a realistic idea to have a deceased legend perform. We got in touch with the team who designed the hologram for Billboard, and they were glad to do help.”

Several internet rumors have been spread over the last couple of weeks saying Katy Perry would grace the Super Bowl halftime stage this year, then rumors claiming it would actually be Carrie Underwood, who already has ties with the NFL from performing the Sunday Night Football intro and theme music, which is also broadcast by NBC.

“All nonsense, the rumors. We get that every year,” said Rousseau. “I even heard one about a mega-concert with people like Eminem and Roger Daltry and Marilyn Manson. I have no idea where these stories originate, but they’re always good for a laugh.”

Rousseau told the Associated Press that this would be the biggest halftime show production in history, and that it will put his committee on the map as one of the most successful planning committees in special event history.

“When this thing is over, the first question people will ask is when the Super Bowl is coming back to Arizona. I’m going to pull a Joe Namath and guarantee that right now, so mark it down,” said Rousseau. “There will be various acts which I cannot reveal at this time, to perform with Holo-Jackson, whom in their own right could handle the job themselves, putting the whole thing over the top with a massive bang, and then a grand-finale that I believe will be known in the future as the most exciting moment in live television history. What we have in store for the great football fans of America will have them gloating with American pride for weeks. Of course it will be a good game, but like most Super Bowls the game will be secondary to the halftime show and the commercials. You thought Janet’s t— were a big deal? Just wait!”

The 2015 Pro Bowl will also be played in Glendale one week before the Super Bowl on January 25th as an experiment by NFL commissioner Roger Goodell after being suggested the idea by Arizona Cardinals President Michael Bidwell. It is the first time since 1980 the Pro Bowl will not be played in Hawaii.

Pittsburgh Steelers Give Tryout To First Female Player

Posted on July 28, 2014 by L.J. Mainville Jr.

PITTSBURGH, Pennsylvania –

It used to be that women in the NFL were cheerleaders. Until recently, there has been a few novelty football leagues such as the Women’s Lingerie Football League (LFL) or the Independent Women’s Football League (IWFL); however, much like Women’s Basketball there is not much of an audience for these games. Other than the occasional “wardrobe malfunction” with the LFL, there really is not much excitement to these games.

With the recent ‘War on Women’ in the political arena, the NFL has decided to take a serious request in considering allowing female players in the NFL, when a request from 24-year-old Kaitlyn Saunders of Erie, PA arrived at St. Vincent College in Latrobe Pennsylvania requesting to try out as a kicker.

“I felt bad, but I told her this was the practice field and we don’t hold walk-on tryouts,” said Dan Calbright, spokesman for the Steelers coaching staff.

Traveling with her father and brother, Kaitlyn made the three hour trek just for a chance to try on the Black and Gold.

“I played soccer for years and I can really put a good boot on the ball,” Kaitlyn said with a toothy smile.

“She’s got a real strong leg,” her brother, Todd Saunders reported. “We were goofin’ off and she actually made a 53 yard goal.” Kaitlyn’s father backed up the story and stated they had her do it several times just to make sure it wasn’t a fluke.

A spokesman for Roger Goodell, NFL commissioner, stated they would give consideration to Kaitlyn pending an evaluation from Pittsburgh’s special teams coach, Danny Smith. When word of Kaitlyn’s skills made it back to Art Rooney, she was invited back to the Steeler’s main practice facility on Pittsburgh’s south side where she met with Danny Smith and the rest of the special team coaches.

“She’s an outstanding kicker and clearly has a strong leg,” Dan Smith reported. “She made a 58-yard kick at our south side facility.” Kaitlyn was 12 for 16 on the day during her invitational workouts, missing two from 45 yards out that she simply didn’t get enough lift on. They were knocked down by a net that is set up for the drill to ensure proper height. Kaitlyn also missed one from 50 yards out and another from 40 yards away.

Coach Smith gave no indication as to whether or not they would recommend Kaitlyn for an actual combine try out, however Roger Goodell’s office is making the consideration a possibility. When asked about drafting such a player, Danny Smith said, “If she’s invited to the combine I’d give her some serious consideration.”

“I’m just hoping that I can open up a couple barriers for the NFL next season,” said Kaitlyn. “They’ve seen what I can do, and now we’ll play the waiting game.”

Michael Vick Sustains Season-Ending Injury After Being Attacked By Dog

Posted on July 27, 2014 by Raoul Stockton

NEW YORK, New York –

On March 21st, Michael Vick signed a $5 million, one year contract with the New York Jets. Yesterday the big pay-day was put in jeopardy after a dog running loose in his New Jersey neighborhood, ironically of a pit bull breed, attacked the quarterback and caused extensive muscle damage to his right leg, which doctors say will keep him from playing football in 2014.

A clause in his contract states that if he is unable to perform at all during the 2014 season due to injury outside of football, he stands to lose up to 85% of the $5 million.

“We certainly hope Mike recovers more quickly than expected and is able to play but according to team physicians it looks highly unlikely,” said team publicist Bryan Welch.

Vick served 18 months of a 23 month sentence for operating a dog fighting ring in 2009. The case was very high-profile and received massive media attention due to the fighting, torture, and executions of pit bulls at the hands of Vick. He missed two complete NFL seasons, and was released by the Atlanta Falcons in August of 2009, making him a free agent. Vick eventually signed with the Philadelphia Eagles where he played until last season. Vick signed the one year deal with the New York Jets in March.

Some are calling Vick’s unfortunate incident poetic justice, such as Jets fan Carmine Vinotossi of Brooklyn, New York.

“He got what he deserved. I am a Jets fan, born and raised since I was 1-year-old, and I was sick the day the Jets announced they hired this bum as a quarterback. $5 million for one year? Give me a break,” said Vinotossi. “What were they thinking, these guys? It looks like karma got it all sorted out now. God is, in fact, a Jets fan.”

It is reported that the dog that attacked Vick was, coincidentally, part of a liter of puppies that had come from an animal shelter that housed dogs from Vick’s dog-fighting ring. The owner, who says that his dog, L.T., which is named after New York Giants’ great Lawerence Taylor, is an extremely loving dog, and will play with the neighborhood children. He has never shown the slightest bit of aggression to anyone prior to the attack.

“L.T. is a super sweet dog,” said owner Aaron Silver. “He loves kids, he loves other dogs. We even have a cat that he sleeps next to every night. When he saw [Vick] walking down the street, it was the first time I’d ever seen any anger in him. I think he could sense Vick’s history, and he knew they had bad ties. I think it was L.T.’s way of getting one back for his family.”

Per state law, dogs that are responsible for an attack are automatically put down. According to police reports after the attack, the dog was actually returned to his owner per request of Vick.

“Mike feels like this was his chance to give a second chance to a pit bull, and that God himself caused the attack as a form of payback,” said a friend. “He got a second chance at life, why shouldn’t this dog?”